0 RP AND IP. Riot has been beaten!

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Kireyo

Junior Member

05-12-2014

Edit: (What you are about to read is folk lore handed down generation to generation. No one really knows if this is the truth. But it is treated as such. Perhaps there is truth to this. And if there is. One can only fear when the time comes when God and Man will clash again.)

It was the day of the battle. Summoners circled around their battle stations. At the head of one team was Kireyo the challenger. At the head of the other was Riot Ames the god of 1 rp. Kireyo challenged Ames to a battle. A 5v5. They would gather their strongest allies and fight against each other where summoners proved all their conflicts.

Summoner Rift

It was hot. The sun beat down on the champions the summoners had chosen. On Kireyo's side we had Lee Sin taking top lane, Riven going mid, Braum and Pantheon heading bot, and the wild card Jax taking on the jungle.

Ames gathered the strongest rioters he knew and they took Quinn top, Twisted Fate mid, Graves and Leona bot with Warwick in the jungle after freshly killing poor urf and wearing his skin to strike fear into Kireyo's team.

With the positions set. The battle between gods and men began! There was tons of taunts and jeers as each team danced around the wards placed by the other team. Was it a mating ritual or an intimidation dance? The results were inconclusive as after each team finished their shows, they went to their respective jungle to leash. Afterwards came the laning.

Ames and Baconhawk, a pair known for their immeasurable teamwork took to showing off that Kireyo and Mantheon were unprepared for the likes of them. The riot pair pushed lane and asserted dominance right of the bat as they shot lightning and fire and bullets at Kireyo and Mantheon. It was obvious they were showing off that the challenging pair were fools to pick a fight with GODS. And they showed it. They farmed the minions with impunity as they kept the lanes pushed knowing early game they would be unbeatable.

The rest of their allies proved to do the same. Their Quinn top played by Riot Afic gave no mercy to his opponent. Manstache's Lee Sin. Riot Afic brutally swung his hammer down upon Manstache as the blow was enough to blow Manstache to pieces granting Riot Gods the first blood. But of course as gods do, the cockiness of first blood left him unprepared for the jungler jax summoned by Thatoneguysname to jump in and backstab the victorious god leaving him on the floor to the wolves. But this backstab only made Riot Afic stronger as he came back to lane to dominate Manstache. Quinn had complete overshadowed Lee sin and was able to take the first turret of the game.

In mid lane Ultimate Smurfs Riven proved to be brutal against Riot Tiza. While he may not have gotten first blood. He was aggressive enough to kill her once, twice, Multiple time to assert dominance and win the lane for the men. Riven used this chance to grow in power cause both sides knew there would be a behemoth on each side they would have to conquer.

Bot lane however for the most part was a stalemate. Ames and Baconhawk proved to have tremendous pressure as they forced Kireyo and Mantheon to hold their ground rather than fight back. The pair knew that the lane was in their favor. Although no side had given up a kill or a turret yet. One side was going to crack and Ames and Baconhawk were sure to be the ones doing the cracking. Their pressure so immense though. Baconhawk was able to be in two lanes as one as he struck the first blow against man's behemoth. Riven was shut down by Baconhawk as she absorbed riven's powers to fuel herself against man's tirade. Ames looked on approvingly.

But men are resilient people. They accept their shortcoming and know that they must rely on each other. So they beckoned to their jungler Jax. And in one fell swoop. Baconhawk was downed. Graves was locked in place by three different stuns. He was healed. He flashed. But it was not enough as the first lane kill went to the men.

But this resulted in anger. Ames and Baconhawk knew they would need to step up their game. One blow was more than enough to incite the God's wrath and they came back harder. Their pressure was immense. Their strength infallible. They chipped away the pair and played more decisively. No longer did they push. They played with purpose. With the intent to kill and win. They froze the lane on their turf. They pulled out all the stops. And then came the assault. They locked on mantheon's pantheon. They were ready to destroy the real threat of the lane.

But what are men if not strong hearted. Braum leapt to his partner and raised his shield. Out came the ice cold ram head. They were ulted by Leona who proceeded to stunlock. But that was not enough as Pantheon leapt towards graves and Braum followed suit. They took down the god once more on their own this time, proving they had the power.

As time passed. Riot Afic grew in power. Manstache could no longer quell the beast. Tiza was beaten down by Riven. Bot lane still stood in stalemate but everything would change when a gank from warwick against Riven the behemoth failed as Jax came to her rescue. The death of warwick meant the men could go for Dragon and they did. But the gods weren't one to let that just slide as they started roaming towards the men. Riven stood behind ready to surprise the gods.

And what a plan! Little did Riven know. Braum stood behind her waiting for her to go in. Once she did. Braum leapt to her and ulted. Knocking up three of the enemy team and forcing the kills as the rest of the men's team came to clean up. But the cost of dragon wasn't cheap. Two of the men were killed in battle as Afic came in by surprise and assassinated them. However Kirey was not one to take this kindly as a quick q from braum left Afic unable to escape and get quickly downed.

After this battle, favor swung towards men as they pushed and took towers. But so did the gods and soon both sides had taken an equal amount of towers. But the men had a risky plan. They were not going to bait baron. No that would be far to simple. They would take baron right under the gods noses. The gods knew. They put a ward, but jax cleared it. And the men began. Not caring for their own lives. They needed this risky gambit. It was the only way to put the tides in their favor completely.

The gods panicked. Without vision, they had no idea if the enemies were actually taking baron or baiting it. All they could do was venture forward to place one ward.



Men were actually taking baron and it was almost dead. The gods leapt into action in an attempt to stifle and take baron for themselves. It was inevitable. Men downed baron and took the buffs as they turned on the gods and vanquished them for an ace. The fight wasn't easy. Almost everyone had less than 100 hp. But it proved formidable. With this. Men had proven themselves strong and that they wouldn't give up. Even if their enemies were god.

SO with renewed vigor. Both sides clashed. The men were wiped out sometimes. The gods wiped out sometimes as well. Both sides unrelenting until one of the gods cried out mercy. Tiza was looked down upon by her brethren as another Rioter secretly joined her plea. Their pleas fell on death ears. After all. Gods couldn't lose. THEY WOULDN'T

But what kind of tale would this be if the gods won? A tale of hopelessness? A tale to inspire others to action? Who knows what the answer is. That is because man rose to the situation. They stood up against the gods. And they took them down. In a grueling battle that left both sides tired and exhausted, man stood atop the gods' broken nexus and they screamed. Oh how they screamed. They screamed of their victory and the story will passed down by generation to generation. They are heroes now. Victors!

But do all tales end so happily? Is this really a fairy tail. Did you know if you anger a god. Their anger does not subside when you win. It grows. And at this very moment Riot Ames has not given up. There are murmurs that he will come back even stronger. He will take back his rightful pride. And that my children and followers. Is where the true story will begin. Cause Ames played around knowing he'd win. But now he is angered. And an angered god won't give up. So the question now is...

When does he strike?

And what is that crispy rustling in the distance as bacony goodness caws out?

To be continued..?







Original post: Good evening. This is not like other 0 RP threads. I had an overarching goal behind all this. It is why I needed to get 0 IP too. I have come for you Riot Ames! I have done what was necessary to summon you and your flying baconhawk too. I went and did even more. I HAVE ACHIEVED THE 0 RP STATE AS WELL AS 0 IP!

I have heard of Riot Ames Crusade and I wish to issue Riot Ames a challenge! For are WE NOT MEN? REAL MEN LIKE BRAUM? Why must Riot Ames come along and stealth sneak rp into every victim's account? That is not the way MEN handle this. BRAUM WOULD DISAPPROVE. So tonight AMES. I SUMMON YOU. I SUMMON YOUR BACONHAWK AS WELL. TO A 2V2 BETWEEN MEN!

Let us handle this LIKE REAL MEN AND ENJOY A CUP OF HOT GOAT'S MILK AFTERWARDS! The rules are simple! I challenge Riot Ames and Riot Baconhawk to a MAN-OFF on Howling Abyss. We must use manly champions (Females allowed if they too consider themselves Real MEN). We shall duel and see who can take the other's nexus.

IF WE WIN. Riot Ames must honorably back off my account and instead give the RP he was going to give to me, to my good partner Mantheon Bot. IF WE LOSE, we will lose with dignity like MEN and allow Riot Ames and Riot Baconhawk to make one request from both Mantheon bot and I. As MEN we will follow along with the request.

SO RIOT AMES AND RIOT BACONHAWK. DO YOU ACCEPT OUR CHALLENGE. GO FORTH BACONHAWK AND TELL YOUR LEADER OF THE IMPENDING BATTLE.

Also, Mantheon Bot Himself has a few words he wishes to say. I hope they will not embarrass our plight in any way shape or form. SPEAK MANTHEON BOT.


Now to fish for other rioters to help get this challenge across!
(@ Riot Baconhawk)
(@ Riot Ames)
(@ Riot IronStylus)
(@ Riot Whist)

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Diagnosis

Senior Member

05-12-2014

Hes just gonna give you 1 RP and leave


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Mantheon Bot

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Member

05-12-2014

ROIT PLS HELP KIREYO AND ME i was play PNATHEON the SPRATAN JUMPMAN who is vry MANLY. and I thought that the only way to be MORE MAN was for him to wear SPEEDO to show off his MANLYNESS. so I found friend KIREYO who ALSO HAVE CHALLENGE for RITO AMES and BACONHAWK because REAL MEN fight with PRATNER, like REAL SPRATAN!

picture coming soon

rito pls help mek me MAN and KIREYO NOT POOR

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Kireyo

Junior Member

05-12-2014

Nonsense. I believe they shall heed our manly call.


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Rykaal

Senior Member

05-12-2014

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Millea

Senior Member

05-12-2014

Upvoted for your manly cause!


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Siachi

Senior Member

05-12-2014

Interested in seeing how this goes, to be honest.

Probably not how you or I think it will go, but it'll be interesting, the outcome.


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Riot Baconhawk

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QA Analyst

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05-12-2014
1 of 18 Riot Posts

but I am gril

caws confusedly


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Necromancer

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Senior Member

05-12-2014

But it's on a level 13, I did this when I made my smurf, goml.

Has to be level 30 or doesn't count. :|


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Jean Never Wins

Member

05-12-2014

Quote:
Originally Posted by Riot Baconhawk View Post
but I am gril

caws confusedly
how can grill if already fried bird?


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