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(Champion Idea) Cee – The Acolyte of Metal

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Morec0

Senior Member

08-24-2013

NOTE: This Champion's name has been changed to something more original. Sadly I cannot alter the title, someone get to Riot about that feature.

If you read this please leave a comment. I would appreciate any and all feedback on this champion, be it good or bad. Thank you and have a wonderful day/night/life in general.

Previous: Civ'Aik - The Void's Grasp (http://forums.na.leagueoflegends.com/board/showthread.php?t=3799169&highlight=morec0)
Next: Zzurik - The Darkin Scythe (http://forums.na.leagueoflegends.com/board/showthread.php?p=42527674#post42527674)

Morec0 Presents:

Iskra – The Acolyte of Metal

Roles: Tank, Fighter

Health: 450 (+80 per level)
HP Regen: 6.84 (+.55 per level)
Mana: 225 (+28 per level)
Mana Regen: 4.5 (+.49 per level)
Damage: 59 (+3.12 per level)
Attack Speed: .675 (+3.1% per level)
Armor: 18 (+2.6 per level)
Magic Ressist: 30 (+1.25 per level)
Movement Speed: 355
Range: 125

(Innate Passive) Ironclad – While above 80% of total health, Iskra gains a shield that intercepts one attack or ability and negates all damage from that attack or ability; all other effects from the attack or ability are still applied. Ironclad goes into cooldown once the attack or ability is blocked.
Cooldown: 100 seconds

[Q] (Active/Passive) Steel Heart / Steel Will – Iskra activates this ability to switch between two separate passives. While Steel Heart is active Iskra's basic attacks deal additional physical damage; while Steel Will is active Iskra gains additional armor and magic resistance based on a percentage of her armor and magic resistance respectively.
Additional Steel Will Damage: 25 / 50 / 75 / 100 / 125 (+60% bonus attack damage)(+20% ability power)
Additional Steel Heart Armor: 10 / 17 / 24 / 31 / 38%
Additional Steel Heart Magic Resistance: 12 / 16 / 20 / 24 / 28%
Cooldown: 1.5 seconds

[W] (Active) Power Surge – Iskra begins to charge and store energy up to a maximum of 10 seconds. At any time Iskra may activate this ability again to stun a target enemy for .5 seconds - plus .15 second for each second this ability was charging (to a maximum of plus 1.5 seconds). If this ability is not used 20 seconds after it is activated, the effect dissipates and the ability goes to cooldown, refunding half of the mana cost.
Damage: 70 / 110 / 150 / 190 / 230 (+80% ability power)
Cooldown: 8 seconds

[E] (Active) Jump Kick - Iskra next attack comes in the form of a powerful kick to her target's head, dealing bonus physical damage. If the attack is a critical strike it will deal additional critical strike damage.
Bonus Damage: 20 / 45 / 70 / 95 / 115 (+45% attack damage)
Additional Critical Strike Damage: 13 / 16 / 19 / 22 / 25%
Cooldown: 20 / 17.5 / 15 / 12.5 / 10 seconds

[R] (Active) Overcharge – Iskra’s power core surges with energy, generating a radius of damage heat around her and causing lightning to arch out at nearby enemies in a wider radius. The lightning targets the two enemies furthest away from Iskra and strikes every 1.5 seconds, prioritizing Champions. Foes within outer radius are damaged and slowed each time they are hit, enemies within the inner radius are damaged for 30% additional damage every second of what foes in the outer radius suffer.
Slow Power: 34 / 39 / 44%
Slow Duration: 3 seconds
Outer Radius Damage: 100 / 170 / 240 when struck (+55% ability power)
Inner Radius Damage: 130 / 221 / 312 per second (+55% ability power)
Total Radius Size: 1200
Inner Radius Size: 450
Duration: 5 seconds
Cooldown: 210 / 150 / 90

Lore:

Iskra is the right hand of Viktor and the most loyal of his followers in the road towards the Glorious Evolution. Improved in both mind and body with powerful techmaturgical enhancements, she is Viktor’s bodyguard, enforcer, emissary, and poster-child all rolled into one. With the incredible power of hextech at her disposal, she stands as a beacon of metal perfection and against any who would try to thwart the path of progress.

Born into the incapable hands of neglectful, abusive parents, Iskra’s childhood was one filled with pain. Her parents, scientists of Zaun, were at best too caught up in their research to give her the attention a child needed or, at worst, used her as a test subject for some of their studies. Only the constant exposure to the wondrous sciences of Zaun as a whole kept her from developing a horrible hatred for techmaturgy, but the same could not be said of her parents. When she had lived only ten years of her life, Iskra sealed her mother and father in one of their own test chambers and electrocuted them to death.

Ruling the parents’ deaths off as an accident, the laws of Zaun placed Iskra in foster care. She tried many times to escape even the loving homes she became a part of, but each time she was captured and placed in the care of a new family. Only when she became a woman was she finally left alone to live out a solitary life on the streets of Zaun. Her survival, though, depended on many an illicit activity – even by the standards of Zaun – and needing refuge from the law she turned to the first group willing to offer her protection: the Glorious Evolution of the Machine Herald.

As she hid among the acolytes of steel, Iskra began to feel a sense of belonging and began to fall into their ways of thinking. In the follower’s of Viktor she found kindred folk, people who had suffered in their past and had come to this place seeking a reprieve from it, and in Viktor himself she found a figure she could idolize, for the first time in her life. What was supposed to be merely a hiding place quickly turned into something more, and soon she agreed to undertake the procedure that would replace most of her human body with mechanical components. As Iskra lay strapped to the operating table, the scalpels and saws of Viktor’s surgeons descending towards her, she began to feel that she may have made a mistake.

But that feeling passed once the procedure was complete. Iskra emerged from the domicile of Viktor’s following a new person, more machine than woman and more powerful than she had ever been before. Fully embracing the feeling of techmaturgy flowing through the wires and sprockets, she left her past behind, and began to look forward to a new and glorious future.

“Techmaturgy is the answer to all the problems of Valoran! What we cannot stop with politics we can end with Glorious Evolution!” – Iskra

Appearance:

Iskra, despite her behavior and general appearance, still has some human left to her Dark grey steel plating covers her body with servos and gears in her joints of her now fully-mechanical arms. Though her thighs are still flesh her metal lower calves have been enhanced with steel struts and turbines, giving her mobility greater than most normal beings. Her face is completely concealed by a metal mask very similar to Viktor’s in make but stylized differently enough to easily separate her face from his, her eyes glowing orange with the arcane techmaturgical power that courses through her body. The mechanical parts are left bare to see on her lower body, the rest covered by knee-long pants, and her upper torso is partially covered by a short-sleeved jacket with a hood that covers her head.

Although the glowing orange power core the fuels her and all of her powers is visible in the center of her chest, up her back runs the main power cable of her mechanical form. Just as with her short blond hair, this is usually hidden by the hood of her jacket, but when the hood is lowered the cable can be seen reaching up into the base of her skull. When defeated it is this core and cable that overcharge and burst into a shower of orange sparks as she collapses to the ground. But such a defeat is only a minor setback, and can be easily repaired for her to rejoin the battle quickly.

But while her abilities provide considerable power, it is impossible to ignore that her body itself is a lethal weapon. Her fingers are sharpened to fine points and blades, and now two-toed feet are also capable of being used as a weapon. A mix of street fighting picked up from her early life and of combat training learned during her service to Viktor is her fighting style, and it makes her a lethal opponent to face in melee combat as any of the League’s more well-armed Champions. Hidden within her right arm is also the cord and handle of her self-contained zip line, able to be deployed where she needs it to be at a moment’s notice for any purpose.

Voice: Feminine, about the same age as Vi, extremely faint hints of a Russian accent, has the same aftereffect as Viktor.

Quotes:

Selection:
“Submit to Glorious Evolution and you shall be reborn!”

Attacking:
“Strength through steel!”
“Kneel to the might of evolution!”
“Behold the power of techmaturgy!”
“Witness true power!”
“They will not hinder our progress!”
“Unlimited power!”
“Glorious evolution is the future of the world!”

Moving:
“Techmaturgy will rebuild this world!”
“Steel perfection!”
“This is what the future looks like!”
“Progress unstoppable!!”
“Metal is perfection!”
“The future is here.”
“Another step towards perfection!”

Joke:
(Iskra holds her arms out, electricity flowing between them as she laughs before they're roughly pulled together and she has to yank them apart with a frustrated growl) "Haha-gah! Grrr, magnets, how do they work?"
(Iskra holds her arms out, electricity flowing between them as she laughs before they're roughly pulled together and she has to yank them apart with a frustrated growl) "Hahaha-ah! Well, at least I know I'm still attractive."

Taunt:
(Iskra flips the hood of her jacket up or down, then slams the palms of her hands together and pulls them apart, lines of electricity flowing between them) “You would refuse us? Those that do not embrace evolution will be crushed underfoot!”
(Iskra flips the hood of her jacket up or down, then slams the palms of her hands together and pulls them apart, lines of electricity flowing between them) “You think yourself strong? You are but flesh; you are not match for techmaturgy!”

Death:
“System… Malfunction...”
“Power core… Unstable…”
“Going… Offline…”

Special Interactions:
(Killing Enemy Jayce) “You will not stop the Glorious Evolution!”
(Meeting Allied Viktor) “Master, together we will crush those who stand against us!”

Playing As:
Overcharge to chase down enemies to stun with Power Surge is a smart tactic for either chasing enemies down or initiating onto enemies for a team fight.
Be mindful of the number of minions you have in lane to draw the attacks of enemy minions, as even their attacks can pop Ironclad's shield.
Try to use Steel Heart for initiating and tanking in team fights and Steel Will for jungling, laning, and ganking early on.

Playing Against:
Be mindful of how long Iskra charges her Power Surge, it may signal she is preparing to set up a gank.
Try not to waste anything powerful taking down Ironclad's shield.
Be EXTREMELY careful of Iskra's ganks and initiates when Overcharge is off cooldown.

Alternate Skins:
Classic Iskra - See Above Description
Cyborg Iskra – Clearly more human, but still has numerous mechanical parts, voice loses the “metal” effect that she shared with Viktor.

Trivia:
The name "Iskra" originates from a South Slavic word meaning "sparks."

I give Riot full permission to use this idea, unaltered or not, should they desire to; all I ask for is a by-name mention.


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The Neverworld

Senior Member

08-25-2013

First of all, you made a nice concept.

But following problems seems to appear for me:

Misleading title of Cee. Why Acolyte of Metal? As I know, Viktor is a Cyborg. He has parts of metal, but he's literally half human. If not, he wouldnt have any hair on his head, because this is a biological reference. How about something like "Acolyte of Machinery" or Techmaturgy or something like that.

Another thing is, you didnt wrote anything about a resource as Mana, Fury, Energy, etc. I see that you didnt write on skill description, but it may be that you have no clue yet wich costs would be capable and you need first some suggestions/opinions from the community.

And you should maybe reduce her ultimate cooldown to 180/150/120. This ability means alot, it helps in teamfight to keep enemies away from vulnerable targets and also helps alot to stop enemies from fleeing. But the low range makes it somewhat useless if it has that huge cooldown


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Tahi Relle

Senior Member

08-25-2013

For the most part, High ratios and Scaling seem to make Cee more of a Burst Fighter than the intended Tanky Fighter. Aside from that, she seems to have a pretty solid set-up. It would be nice to get a tiny bit of clarification of some things, though

[Q] Steel Heart/Will

Is the Bonus Dmg Physical or Magical? If Physical, holy **** Im never playing her as a tank. Even then, the ratios and initial amounts are amazingly high when you consider the attack speed items Fighters can/do build. With no AP built into it and No bonus attack Damage, thats going to be 112+140 Damage per hit. Building into that? The numbers get crazy for carries. A good quickfix is to make the Bonus Damage from Attack damage a percentage of BONUS Attack damage, not total attack damage. That way Cee has to activately make the "Build Tank" or "Build Fighter" choice, instead of "Build Tank and be a Fighter anyway".

[W] Power Surge

So, she has to wait 10 seconds to use a weak stun, and while waiting those ten seconds she receives reduced Armor/MR? It seems sort of counter-intuitive to a Tank's Role. Remember, a Tank needs to be able to charge in and draw attention to themselves and do all sorts of shinaniganz. If they aren't taking damage in place of their team, they aren't actually Tanking. I can see lots of situations where Cee will have about 2 seconds to charge her Surge before the other team dives, completely ignores her because she cant stop them, and deals with her after they wipe out her team.

Its activation also seems awkward. After activating, you HAVE to wait ten seconds, then you can activate it again to actually use the ability. How low does this "use" activation last? When does the Cooldown start? My suggestion is make the activation similar to Jax's stun. After (X) it can be re-activated, but if you wait longer you'll get a bigger benefit, such as a longer stun, or more damage.

[E] Grapple
Love it, Love it, Love it, Love it, Love it. Only one small thing you missed; what is the damage reduction amount/percentage?


[R] Overcharge
Some wording clarifications needed.
Cee’s power core surges with energy, generating a radius of damage heat around her and causing lightning to arch out at nearby enemies in a wider radius. The lightning targets the two enemies furthest away from Cee and strikes every 1.5 seconds. Foes within outer radius are damaged and slowed each time they are hit, enemies within the inner radius are damaged for double that of foes in the outer radius every second.

So does that mean foes closer are actually taking 300% the total possible damage? (doubled to 200%, then rate of damage increased by .33 making them take about 100% more damage) Whether or not they're taking 100, or 300% of the amounts, those are very high amounts to be dealing each seconds/1.5 seconds. Or are they? How long does this ability last? If it lasts a couple seconds, thats only 500-1500 magic damage. No so bad for a long CD ult. If it lasts 4-6, thats 2000-4000/3000-6000 Damage; easily destroying an entire team.

Aside from the high damage amounts and wording, I think this ability is great for a tank. Esspecially since it targets the furthest away first. Imagine how annoying it is to be Jimbo the Mega Blocker, just to have Wu Kong the Jerkface Monkey Jump over you and eat your bannaman the Crazy Carry? With this, the Tank might have the possibility of helping the Carry when they cant peel for those Jumpy champs like Talon and Akali. I'd say reduce the damage and increase the outer range. 300 is really short when you consider all the abilities that slow, stun and render this ability pointless at such a small radius. However, if everyone instantly dies from the high damage, that doesn't leave much room for counter-play or esscape. Just for death.


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Anya the Sin

Junior Member

08-25-2013

I find this suspicious. I just talked to a couple people about how a new "metal" champion is needed. I would say about 4 hours ago.


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The Neverworld

Senior Member

08-25-2013

Quote:
Anya the Sin:
I find this suspicious. I just talked to a couple people about how a new "metal" champion is needed. I would say about 4 hours ago.

Yeah very suspicious.

http://forums.na.leagueoflegends.com/board/showthread.php?t=3499414

Oh look, I'm a fortune-teller xD


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Morec0

Senior Member

08-25-2013

Quote:
The Neverworld:
First of all, you made a nice concept.

But following problems seems to appear for me:

Misleading title of Cee. Why Acolyte of Metal? As I know, Viktor is a Cyborg. He has parts of metal, but he's literally half human. If not, he wouldnt have any hair on his head, because this is a biological reference. How about something like "Acolyte of Machinery" or Techmaturgy or something like that.


Acolyte of Metal seemed to flow SO well and still fit within Viktor's entire ideals. "Metal is perfection", "steel can fix all your flaws", so I'm not sure that really NEEDS to be changed, but I'll consider it. What I would say you are right on, though, is that I made her TOO MUCH of a machine. I'll go back and edit her description to give her a little more human.

Quote:
Another thing is, you didnt wrote anything about a resource as Mana, Fury, Energy, etc. I see that you didnt write on skill description, but it may be that you have no clue yet wich costs would be capable and you need first some suggestions/opinions from the community.


Costs is just something I've never included. I put in a mana/mana regen thing in her base stats, so I do mean to suggest she uses mana. But yeah, you pretty much hit the nail on the head with that - not that I really want to DEMAND anything of the readers, but if you want to help me out I'd appreciate it (heck, maybe this'll give me starting point to go back and edit ALL mana or whatever costs in XD).

Quote:
And you should maybe reduce her ultimate cooldown to 180/150/120. This ability means alot, it helps in teamfight to keep enemies away from vulnerable targets and also helps alot to stop enemies from fleeing. But the low range makes it somewhat useless if it has that huge cooldown


These numbers started out at 400 seconds at level 6 XD Honestly I was terrified that the cooldown would be TOO LOW for something as powerful as that, so I thought I'd try to balance that by giving a high cooldown so he would have to try and make it work as best she could when first using the ability. But if it seems a little high, I'll lower it down and see what effect that has.

Quote:
Tahi Relle:
For the most part, High ratios and Scaling seem to make Cee more of a Burst Fighter than the intended Tanky Fighter. Aside from that, she seems to have a pretty solid set-up. It would be nice to get a tiny bit of clarification of some things, though


Be glad to.

Quote:
[Q] Steel Heart/Will

Is the Bonus Dmg Physical or Magical? If Physical, holy **** Im never playing her as a tank. Even then, the ratios and initial amounts are amazingly high when you consider the attack speed items Fighters can/do build. With no AP built into it and No bonus attack Damage, thats going to be 112+140 Damage per hit. Building into that? The numbers get crazy for carries. A good quickfix is to make the Bonus Damage from Attack damage a percentage of BONUS Attack damage, not total attack damage. That way Cee has to activately make the "Build Tank" or "Build Fighter" choice, instead of "Build Tank and be a Fighter anyway".


Makes sense. Thanks for the suggestion. Should I tweak the percentage down as well or would the "bonus" bit fix that enough?

Quote:
[W] Power Surge

So, she has to wait 10 seconds to use a weak stun, and while waiting those ten seconds she receives reduced Armor/MR? It seems sort of counter-intuitive to a Tank's Role. Remember, a Tank needs to be able to charge in and draw attention to themselves and do all sorts of shinaniganz. If they aren't taking damage in place of their team, they aren't actually Tanking. I can see lots of situations where Cee will have about 2 seconds to charge her Surge before the other team dives, completely ignores her because she cant stop them, and deals with her after they wipe out her team.

Its activation also seems awkward. After activating, you HAVE to wait ten seconds, then you can activate it again to actually use the ability. How low does this "use" activation last? When does the Cooldown start? My suggestion is make the activation similar to Jax's stun. After (X) it can be re-activated, but if you wait longer you'll get a bigger benefit, such as a longer stun, or more damage.


This was really though of with early lane phase in mind. Something to help her face off against rangier characters like Jayce and Vi (who I was kinda looking to design her for play against). It probably IS pretty underpowered, but apparently I thought it would be overpowered enough that I gave it a drawback, so I'll definitely alter it like you said. Keep it a single target spell, though, in order to differentiate it from the similar Jax spell

Quote:
[E] Grapple
Love it, Love it, Love it, Love it, Love it. Only one small thing you missed; what is the damage reduction amount/percentage?


WHOOPS! I forgot about that XD I'll edit that in right away!

But glad you like it. It's definitely the most unique ability I've EVER come up with.

Quote:
[R] Overcharge
Some wording clarifications needed.
Cee’s power core surges with energy, generating a radius of damage heat around her and causing lightning to arch out at nearby enemies in a wider radius. The lightning targets the two enemies furthest away from Cee and strikes every 1.5 seconds. Foes within outer radius are damaged and slowed each time they are hit, enemies within the inner radius are damaged for double that of foes in the outer radius every second.

So does that mean foes closer are actually taking 300% the total possible damage? (doubled to 200%, then rate of damage increased by .33 making them take about 100% more damage) Whether or not they're taking 100, or 300% of the amounts, those are very high amounts to be dealing each seconds/1.5 seconds. Or are they? How long does this ability last? If it lasts a couple seconds, thats only 500-1500 magic damage. No so bad for a long CD ult. If it lasts 4-6, thats 2000-4000/3000-6000 Damage; easily destroying an entire team.


Okay, numbers may be a bit high. I'll tinker around with it, maybe reduce it to like 50/75% damage instead. Will be adding duration and altering the CD to be a bit lower (as was suggested by the first responder) so the lower numbers WILL be needed.

Quote:
Aside from the high damage amounts and wording, I think this ability is great for a tank. Esspecially since it targets the furthest away first. Imagine how annoying it is to be Jimbo the Mega Blocker, just to have Wu Kong the Jerkface Monkey Jump over you and eat your bannaman the Crazy Carry? With this, the Tank might have the possibility of helping the Carry when they cant peel for those Jumpy champs like Talon and Akali. I'd say reduce the damage and increase the outer range. 300 is really short when you consider all the abilities that slow, stun and render this ability pointless at such a small radius. However, if everyone instantly dies from the high damage, that doesn't leave much room for counter-play or esscape. Just for death.


Glad you liked this one as well (Grapple's still my favorite >.> ) but I'll definitely alter the range and numbers to make it a little more viable and less crazy.

Quote:
Anya the Sin:
I find this suspicious. I just talked to a couple people about how a new "metal" champion is needed. I would say about 4 hours ago.


Yes, I traveled back in time to post this ability before your conversation so that I could startle you specifically.

Quote:
The Neverworld:
Yeah very suspicious.

http://forums.na.leagueoflegends.com/board/showthread.php?t=3499414

Oh look, I'm a fortune-teller xD


This isn't that kind of metal!


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Morec0

Senior Member

08-26-2013

Still against changing the name of the character, but I've added more detail to her ultimate with the duration of the slow it produces.


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Sir Shadow Isles

Senior Member

08-28-2013

metal perfection and against any who

There should be no "and" here.

Orphaned to the streets of Piltover at a young age, Vi and Cee got by however they could.

You should mention that they are siblings. Ex: Orphaned to the streets of Piltover, Cee and her sister Vi got by however they could.

as well

This is not needed here.

do, and by the end of the dispute

There should be different comma placement here. "The two argued over what the other should do and, by the end of the dispute, the two formerly close sisters went their separate ways."

for only so long, and after a heist in Demacia nearly

"After" should be the start of a new sentence.

something more; and she agreed


That semicolon should not be there.

the wires and sprockets she left her past behind

There should be a comma after sprockets.


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Morec0

Senior Member

08-28-2013

Quote:
Sir Shadow Isles:
metal perfection and against any who

There should be no "and" here.


Actually, there should. It's saying that she stands AS a beacon of metal perfect AND stands against any who oppose it. It's a stylistic choice.

Quote:
Orphaned to the streets of Piltover at a young age, Vi and Cee got by however they could.

You should mention that they are siblings. Ex: Orphaned to the streets of Piltover, Cee and her sister Vi got by however they could.


Quote:
as well

This is not needed here.


Again, I'm going to argue that it is. It's basically a replacement for "who had no interest in also recruiting her sister" - again a stylistic choice.

Quote:
do, and by the end of the dispute

There should be different comma placement here. "The two argued over what the other should do and, by the end of the dispute, the two formerly close sisters went their separate ways."

for only so long, and after a heist in Demacia nearly

"After" should be the start of a new sentence.

something more; and she agreed


That semicolon should not be there.

the wires and sprockets she left her past behind

There should be a comma after sprockets.


Thanks for the assistance. This is what I get for writing at 1 in the morning -_-


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LVNsNASmurf

Senior Member

08-28-2013

Morec0, I'll try to be short. Your skills are poorly explained, underpowered and generally confused. Q is about the only skill that is well done. However, the core ideas are solid.

W has incredibly low damage, an absurd charge up for a tiny pay off. It also needs a range listed and a cost listed. Even with that, it's still a 5 second CD 1.25 second stun.

I can't even figure out how E works. It's a dash. But you can just ride back and forth on it for 14 seconds? Make it a one way engage tool, you zip to the end, then slow enemies around you. You should probably specify what range that slow is in too.

Your ultimate says 30% more damage, but the actual numbers are only 10%. The radius needs to be larger, the damage should be listed as per second or X over 4.5 seconds. The cooldown is way to high for such a skill, and I would look at the CD of Nunu and Fiddles's Ults. In addition, I would say all enemies in the radius should get hit and slowed.

As for Role, this is clearly a tank, and not at all a fighter. If you fix up your numerical issues, the kit itself lends itself to a great full on tank kit. You switch to defensive Q, then Zipline in, fire the stun at priority target and ultimate to cause the enemy to disperse. Once the big damage has been thrown, you switch to damage Q for clean up.

Still, it's a solid concept which just needs a bit of clean up with regards to mechanics.

My current project is Xenoshred, the Adaptive Infiltrator (http://forums.na.leagueoflegends.com/board/showthread.php?t=3795798)


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