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What about when you first started your journey up the Normal elo ladder? I'm pretty sure the elo calculations aren't very different. In fact, you managed to suck, because it was your first time, and everyone else around you sucked, but you climbed up off noobie island and started to play against normal people.
And yet you claim that now, all of a sudden, ranked games are any different? That your varying levels of suck have no bearing on where you are? Just to drive the point home further, here's a picture of a kitten: