The gloomy tale of my life. Worth the read...

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Teen Money

Junior Member

10-08-2012

*Clears throat"

Hello my summoners,
I am here to tell you a brief tale of my life, If you have a weak heart I suggest you to leave...
I was born on a tiny mud pile in one of the murky recesses in the world. We have more kin in different areas but we are more civilized as one would say, the tribes name were the "Ruhgosk". Our tribes I guess you could say had ranking members, some would be a shamans, warriors or even the regular house wives.

Everything was normal accept one thing, our tribe was dying from a disease we have received from past confrontations. The plague would cause our skins would fall off or bleed through the pores, death was imminent. Luckily we had a special ability, through generations of generations (Charles Darwin es #1.) we obtained a way of healing ourselves passively. This ability countered the plague extending our life time warranty.

As I was growing up I learned that my self healing ability was far superior than the others, I almost looked like I didn't have the disease. I tried to figure out why my ability was loftier than others. I thought of my friends white power cells as foot soldiers and mines as an F-22. This ability also gave me a plus in my tribe, since I was the least deteriorated the girls in my tribe would be all over me and damn I loved them BBWs.

Well after some time our shaman found a way of magically binding all of the others STDs into one body. I wished he would have ****ing read the "Guide for magically binding diseases into inanimate objects". I mean this *****, why the heck would he want to put all of our tribes STDs into one forsaken body.

I wish I could take Zileans ultimate, guardian angel, and maybe Yoricks ultimate then kindly ask Darius to come to practice his "Noxian Guillotine" on him, but that's where the ultimate's and guardian angels come in. I would use their abilitys to revive him each time after Darius would ultimate so he would feel the pain like a just out of the womb infant Teemo being ulted by Karthus with 5 Archangels and 1 Deathcap with a rune page of magical penetration (for that extra sexual tension in our ultimate :3).

Anyway because of my enhanced ability and humbleness I volunteered to be the one to carry the curse of my tribe. I endured a baptism of searing agony, when the ritual was finished my beautiful and sexy body turned into black apple sauce. It literally was like you were taking an endless ****, BUT ALL OVER YOUR BODY.
Nasus: The cycle of **** continues, you will eat while you're ****ting.

Anyway so after painfully regretting my decision I joined the LoL. I am still trying to look for someone to cure me so I can once look like Fabio. I tried asking our healers but they're useless, but there are many hot chicks with big boobs.

Yup, well this is my story to you all. Nows the challenge,
WHOS THAT CHAMPION ?


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Intsikandy

Senior Member

10-08-2012

It's Pikachu.


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De Zwijger

Member

10-09-2012

Trundle


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RonniePunani

Member

10-09-2012

its obviously a potato, named chip.


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MadManDu

Senior Member

10-09-2012

Trundleee


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mistmann

Senior Member

10-10-2012

lol its the troll


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SentinelOfPain

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Senior Member

10-10-2012

Trundle's story, I cry everi tiem.

But seriously, lost my **** at Nasus: The cycle of **** continues, you will eat while you're ****ting. Good job.