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KDA is probably a better metric than points, but not by much. I'm sure we've all had games where the team leading in kills by a huge margin ends up losing, and a bot laner with 4/7/2 might have been carrying the game by constantly forcing 2v1s at the enemy bot tower.
The only way to get rid of whining is to speak out against it; especially when it's not directed at you. Defending yourself isn't going to stop the whining (if someone is whining about your score, they've already classified you as "bad", but defending someone else might.
And for the record, the idea of "feeding" is completely and utterly stupid on Dominion. Killing three minions or neutralise -> capture a point earns more gold than a kill. In the vast majority of games, the only significant gold gap is between bot and top.