What would you do if your spouse cheated on you?

Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

Mere Intricacy

This user has referred a friend to League of Legends, click for more information

Senior Member

08-25-2012

JtF never answered how my response reflected self-esteem issues...


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

My Face Is OP

This user has referred a friend to League of Legends, click for more information

Member

08-25-2012

If you are open and honest cheating never occurs. You only get cheated on when the person doesn't like you anymore and it's usually your fault.


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

Sailor Cosmos

Senior Member

08-25-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dobagoh View Post
No it isn't, because you incorrectly assume the only source of bias against a man arising out of a rape accusation is through the courts, more specifically, via the jury..
Isn't that all we are referring to? COURT cases?

I'll continue this tomorrow. I need to go to bed.


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

UrsaMinor

Senior Member

08-25-2012

Goodnight


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

Jesus the Friend

Member

08-26-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Parthenrien View Post
JtF, you're pretty muffled.

Could you please try pulling your head out of your ass, so we can understand what you're trying to 'tell' us?
Sure sounds like something a mangina would say.

Quote:
If you are open and honest cheating never occurs
This is probably the only non retarded argument in favor of conserving the relationship in here.

Most everyone else is a female or a perennial pussycat without the cat.


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

poe tay toes

Senior Member

08-26-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mere Intricacy View Post
JtF never answered how my response reflected self-esteem issues...

Quote:
I would find out why they cheated. Have a long conversation about why they're arent satisifed and see how we can work together to fix it...
well, it looks like you're assuming some level of guilt in this. if it was your fault, the guy should have said something to you or left you in the first place. most of the time, its just that the guy had an impulse to get busy with some skank and he followed through on it.

either way, you're talking about working together to fix it by trying harder to satisfy him, which is tantamount to granting forgiveness. what about what you need? why be in a relationship with someone you clearly can't trust? i think its safe to say that people who cheat once tend to cheat again, so you're only setting yourself up for another round of the same issue when you should feel like you deserve better than a cheating scumbag.


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

Kodoku

Senior Member

08-26-2012

Quote:
Stay in the relationship and maintain a civil relationship to keep your child from being hurt and having to live apart from one parent at a time?
I never understood this mentality. How can maintaining a toxic relationship ever be in the interests of the child? Personally, the choice would be an obvious one to me. Married to someone who took an oath to be faithful, and then wasn't? The marriage was over the moment that oath was broken. Divorce just formalizes it.


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

Sailor Cosmos

Senior Member

10-07-2012

I'm a little late. :">

Quote:
Originally Posted by BDSandM View Post
Women don't win custody battles just because of their gender, but because of legitimate reasons. Typically, the person who has taken care of the children in the household as the main caretaker gets custody, because that's who the children are accustomed to.

I encourage you to read and research before you make inaccurate assumptions:

Quote:
Originally Posted by BDSandM View Post
Women have just as much worry getting into a relationship as men do emotionally, physically, and legally.

Just like if you were to do your research on the wage gap between men and women and stop assuming the most obvious answer without research {men are paid more than women}, you will find that the default assumption isn't correct and there is more to it than that.

The default assumption in this case is that courts rule by biased ideology that fathers are incompetent, awarding the mother custody.

First, get this idea out of your head that all women are perfect, nurturing, loving, caring, etc. It's not true. Just like men, we like to be selfish from time to time, and we have bad sides too. We get angry, vengeful, violent, abusive, crazy, etc.

Got that? Good. Now when you enter a relationship, you should exercise "skepticism." That means you acknowledge that there is a possibility that she could cheat on you, abuse you, take you for everything you're worth. Evil is not an exclusive word for men.

I've talked to men who had terrible past relationships and I decoded their reactions as if they were surprised a woman could do such a thing to them. Then they later subtly blame the entire gender for deceiving them. No, certain women deceive, and if you stop feeding into mainstream media and use common sense, you will see that women are humans and we have human emotions and actions just... like... you.

Onto injustices. Injustices in the court system happen to both men and women and both men and women are guilty of committing/allowing injustices.

Yes, the courts are biased when it comes to custody settlements, but there are legitimate reasons behind this.

I suggest you read these articles and watch the video, as they are my sources for the rest of my rant (they shouldn't take more than 2-3 minutes each):
http://www.askmen.com/dating/single_...e_fathers.html
http://www.attorneys.com/legal_cente...stody_battles/
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zBnMM...eature=related

Women do research on how to win a custody case. They do everything they possibly can to be THE parent that is the BEST possible choice.

In a hypothetical example: Let's say both parents are equally equipped to be exceptional parents. They both make adequate amounts of money, both show good parenting skills, both seem to be loving, etc. Who would you decide to win custody? If the choice was that difficult, I think the default parent would be the mother, just because of stereotypical characteristics, which do have some truth. The women give birth, breastfeed (both of which do in fact have an impact on a child's connection and closeness to their mother because of the release of certain hormones or some sh*t, which can be further researched on your own), raise the children for a little while after they are born, and women are socially accepted to openly express and show emotions of love, nurture, and care. Women are also known to be good with behavior and words. These are indeed biased reasons simply because men cannot achieve most of those reasons, but in situations such as this, are they not good reasons?

Also, many women filing for custody may already be stay-at-home mothers. That could be another reason why judges would grant the woman custody.

Conclusion: I don't think a man and a woman walk into a courtroom and the woman just automatically wins custody. Maybe the real reason is that most women are just more qualified for the job and have proven that they are. Whether they are lying or telling the truth, they did something to prove to the judge that they were the better option to take care of the children. Of course, with the angry men I come across, they never allow this to be a possibility. They let their anger they have for their ex blind them and automatically assume it's biased sexism rather than the woman is just a better choice in more aspects.

You may be a **** good father, but she just might be better...

HOWEVER, there are women who win cases who are completely undeserving of custody. Sadly, that happens, but sadly, the reverse happens as well.

Injustice example of a pedophilic man winning custody of his daughter over the mother:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsH-z...eature=related

Yes, it sucks that your wife may have just one more qualification to raise your child than you do, but you can lower your chances of such an outcome by not marrying, not having children, choosing your wife carefully, or put the BS behind you and try to make things work with your wife to acquire joint custody. Or if she's a b*tch, prove to the judge you're the better candidate and hope for the best. The same can be applied to women as well, because bad men win sometimes too.

Congratulations if you read all of this!


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

Jesus the Friend

Member

10-07-2012

Necromancy is a dark and powerful art.

It's also against forum rules and a bannable offense.


Comment below rating threshold, click here to show it.

ChoppazAndDakka

Senior Member

10-07-2012

I would beat her to death with a nerf bat.