Desaan, the Nether Vizier

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Cryypter

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Senior Member

02-13-2012

I've had this finished for a while, but I was originally going to submit it for a contest. That contest appears to have fallen through, so I've decided to just post it. I've wanted to design a Void champ for a while (the Void is probably my favorite aspect of LoL lore), and since there is a Void champ for the other roles, I decided to make it a support. Plus we need some new supports anyway.

Tell me what you think! Comments/criticism/questions are always appreciated.

__________________________________________________ ______________________

Desaan, the Nether Vizier


Role: Support, Ranged

He's designed to support by debuffing enemies as much as he buffs allies.

Attack : ||--------
Health: ||||------
Spells: |||||||---



Lore: Everyone knows of the major city-states, such as Demacia and Noxus. But there are many smaller city-states throughout Valoran that are not as prominent or influential. Desaan lived in one such sovereignty, the chief adviser and right hand to the local monarch. Among his other duties, he was tasked with devising methods of espionage, both mundane and magical. Ever zealous in his quest, he probed the depths of arcane knowledge, leading him to dark and forbidden arts not meant for the minds of men. Upon discovering the subject of his obsession, the king decided he had gone too far and ordered him arrested. But by then it was too late; he had stumbled upon the Void. It shattered his sanity and began corrupting his body. Bursting into his chambers, the guards caught a final look at Desaan, now barely recognizable, before he vanished into a swirling vortex. The few guards that were courageous (or perhaps foolish) enough to chase after him into the rift were never seen nor heard from again.

But use of such powerful magic did not escape the the notice of the League. In a search that spanned several months, League Adjudicators finally managed to locate and restrain Desaan. But he was no longer Desaan; he was infested with tiny Voidlings which had restructured his body, transforming it into a living nest. Their efforts, combined with his repeated exposure to Void energies, had resulted in a half man half Voidborn aberration. In his new monstrous form, he now stalks the Fields of Justice, awaiting the fulfillment of Malzahar's prophecies and his freedom from the Summoners.


Abilities:

Innate - Absorption: Desaan regains 3% of his max mana for each spell cast near him. Subsequent casts within 5 seconds grant 20% less mana than the previous spell.

Gives him some good mana regen when near casters. The reduction in mana gain for subsequent spells has less of an effect on burst casters, but makes it so someone like Eve can't just spam abilities and give him infinite mana.


Q - Leech: Desaan latches an appendage onto a target. If used on an enemy, it drains energy from the target which damages and slows them over 3 seconds, storing 1 stack per second (max 9 stacks). If used on an ally, it injects the drained energy, instantly healing them and granting a burst of speed based on the number of stacks.

Cost: 60/70/80/90/100 mana
Cooldown: 10 seconds for drain, none for heal
Channel Duration: 3 seconds
Damage (magic): 20/35/50/65/80 (+0.15 AP) per second
Slow: 30%
Heal: 20/30/40/50/60 (+0.15 AP) per stack
Speed Bonus: 5% per stack
Cast Range: 600
Leash Range: 800

Provides a good slow and a fair amount of damage when used on enemies. The heal and speed boost is pretty high with max stacks, but it you have to build it up first. 9 stacks will give 540 (+ 1.35 AP) health and 45% MS, but you have to drain an enemy 3 times for the full duration first. Desaan can't use it on himself though, he has to rely on his W.


W - Infestation: Desaan infests the target with void parasites for 5 seconds. The infestation will spread to nearby enemies every second. If the infested units are enemies, they take damage and Desaan steals 50% of healing and regeneration effects on them. Units cannot be infected more than once per activation.

Cost: 80 mana
Cooldown: 16/14/12/10/8 seconds
Duration: 5 seconds
Damage (magic): 20/30/40/50/60 (+0.1 AP) per second
Cast Range: 750
Spread Range: 175

This has a couple different uses. It can be used to deter melee champs from attacking allies or farming, since the parasites will spread to them if the get in range to last hit. It can keep enemies from hiding behind minions, helping allies land skillshots. The healing reduction is a good counter to carries and champs who rely on lifesteal. It also provides some good lane sustain, especially combined with his innate.


E - Nether Shield: Desaan places a shield of void energies on an ally, absorbing damage and silencing enemies who attack the shielded unit. (Does not trigger on AoE effects).

Cost: 100 mana
Cooldown: 14/13/12/11/10
Shield Strength: 50/100/150/200/250 (+0.6 AP)
Shield Duration: 4 seconds
Silence Duration: 2 seconds
Cast Range: 650

Especially good against burst casters, since their first spell will silence them, preventing them from using their whole combo.


R - Void Portal: Desaan creates a nether portal between two locations, allowing units to travel instantly between each end. Enemy units which pass through it will take true damage (can only be damaged once this way). 1 second delay between consecutive uses.
(Note: the portals are circular, but they're vertical, so they act more like lines.)

Cost: 150/200/250 mana
Cooldown: 140/130/120 seconds
Duration: 5 seconds
Max Distance Between Portals: 600/850/1100
Portal Width: 300
Cast Range: 900
Damage: 8%/12%/16% of max HP (+1% per 100 AP)

This ability provides a lot of utility, since it basically gives your entire team a blink. You can save allies trapped behind a wall; Amumu doesn't need flash to initiate; Fiddle can ult into one end and come out behind the enemy team. The thing to keep in mind is it's a two way street, so if an enemy has enough health to tank the damage, they can jump into the middle of your team as well. This could also be used though, since you could bait enemies through the portal into your team.


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NE Cupcakes

Recruiter

02-13-2012

A void support seems like an odd choice, but it looks like it works. A couple of things, though.
1) Does his innate get triggered by his own spells?
2) Q/Leech: Can he target himself with the heal/ms boost? If so, that may be a little OP combined with the potential heal from Infestation.
3) On your ult, do enemies also 'teleport' through the portal, or only take damage?
4) Ult again; AP scaling true damage on a utility ability may be too much. Make it flat true damage, and then have the AP scaling do magic damage, independently?


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Cryypter

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Senior Member

02-13-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by R473D R View Post
A void support seems like an odd choice, but it looks like it works. A couple of things, though.
1) Does his innate get triggered by his own spells?
2) Q/Leech: Can he target himself with the heal/ms boost? If so, that may be a little OP combined with the potential heal from Infestation.
3) On your ult, do enemies also 'teleport' through the portal, or only take damage?
4) Ult again; AP scaling true damage on a utility ability may be too much. Make it flat true damage, and then have the AP scaling do magic damage, independently?
First, thanks for the feedback.

1) I haven't quite decided. I've been switching back and forth, but at the moment his spells do trigger it.
2) No, he can only target allies. You're right, having the heal from both would probably be OP.
3) Yes, enemies also teleport. This allows for more strategy and possible uses. For example, enemies who are confident they have enough health can take the hit in order to continue chasing you/an ally, but you can then use this to bait enemies.
4) I tried to make the scaling low enough that the damage would stay reasonable (400 AP adds 120 damage), but you may be right. I'll take another look at it.

EDIT: For 4, remember that the damage is not always easy to trigger. You either have to time it just right, have a knockback/pull ability, or the enemy has to choose to take the damage.


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evawin

Senior Member

02-16-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryypter View Post
I've had this finished for a while, but I was originally going to submit it for a contest. That contest appears to have fallen through, so I've decided to just post it. I've wanted to design a Void champ for a while (the Void is probably my favorite aspect of LoL lore), and since there is a Void champ for the other roles, I decided to make it a support. Plus we need some new supports anyway.

Tell me what you think! Comments/criticism/questions are always appreciated.
Void champion, hm? HEAVEN OR HELL! DUEL 1! LET'S ROCK!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryypter View Post

Desaan, the Nether Vizier


Lore: Everyone knows of the major city-states, such as Demacia and Noxus. However, there are many smaller city-states throughout Valoran that are not as prominent or influential. Desaan lived in one such sovereignty, the chief adviser and right hand to the local ruler. Among his duties, he was tasked with devising methods of espionage, both mundane and magical. Ever zealous in his quest, he probed the depths of arcane knowledge; these lead him to dark and forbidden arts not meant for the minds of men. Upon discovering the subject of Desaan's obsession, the ruler decided he had gone too far and ordered him arrested. By then it was too late. He had stumbled upon the Void, shattering his sanity and corrupting his body. Bursting into his chambers, the guards caught a final look at Desaan, now barely recognizable, before he vanished into a swirling vortex. The few guards that were courageous (or perhaps foolish) enough to chase after him into the rift were never seen nor heard from again.

But use of such powerful magic did not escape the the notice of the League. Investigating the incident, League Adjudicators finally managed to locate and restrain Desaan. (Really weird wording. I can't change it without completly reworking your meaning. :P ) But he was no longer Desaan; he was infested with tiny Voidlings which had restructured his body, transforming it into a nest. Their efforts, combined with his repeated exposure to Void energies, had resulted in a half man, half Voidborn aberration. In his new monstrous form, he now stalks the Fields of Justice, awaiting the fulfillment of Malzahar's prophecies and his freedom from the Summoners.
Bolded areas indicate some changes that I felt made the lore and paragraphs flow better. :P

Mainly, I changed king to ruler since being the "king" of a small, minor city-state doesn't sound quite right.

The second paragraph is fairly cluttered and rushed by comparison to the first. You went into a good degree of detail about his job prior to the Void, but then skip over the Void portion to "and then he became a monster and is now in the League". Perhaps if you reduce the first and add that space to the second?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryypter View Post
Abilities:

Innate - Absorption: Desaan regains 10/16/22 mana for each spell cast near him. Cannot occur more than once every second. Increases at lvl 7 & 13.
Pretty solid ability; kind of reminds me of Maokai in a sense. However, this feels like it can be either very weak or very strong (being paired with someone like Sona for free mana everywhere! ). If I were you, I would make it more like Maokai's ult with a stack system but restoring percentage mana; however, that's just me. :P

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryypter View Post
Q - Leech: Desaan latches an appendage onto a target. If used on an enemy, it drains energy from the target which damages and slows them, storing 1 stack per second (max 9 stacks). If used on an ally, it injects the drained energy, healing them and granting a burst of speed based on the number of stacks.

Cost: 60/70/80/90/100 mana
Cooldown: 10 seconds for drain, none for heal
Duration: 3 seconds
Damage (magic): 20/35/50/65/80 (+0.5*AP) per second
Slow: 30%
Heal: 20/30/40/50/60 (+0.5*AP) per stack
Speed: 5% per stack
A siphoning system; pretty neat. :3

My biggest issue is the Speed bonus per stack. that's 45% movement on top of the 30% slow that your target has. Maybe toning down the bonus MS would be in order... In addition, it took me a few read-throughs, but I realized that the stack duration was 3 seconds. Having the ability be immediately active for healing purposes after significantly damaging an enemy seems very abusable; I would get rid of the bonus movement speed per stack, increase the stack duration past the cooldown of the move, and then give both the heal and the drain the same cooldown. It's already nuking one person which, in lane, is good enough especially with a flat 30% slow (Nunu is crying tears of sadness from what life was like before his nerfs); on top of that, it can be used to simultaneously heal someone or a rather hefty amount? I think this single move has a little too much going on.

Mechanics aside, I have a few questions, though. Can Desaan move while the appendage is attached, or does he have to sit and treat it like a channel? What's the range? The 0.5 AP has an asterisk next to it, which I don't exactly know what that means. Does it mean that the 0.5 AP ratio is showing the maximum AP ratio after 10 seconds? Or is it really 0.5 AP per second, stacking up to 5 AP after 10 seconds? :x

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryypter View Post
W - Infestation: Desaan infests the target with void parasites for 5 seconds, which will spread to nearby enemies. Infested units take damage and Desaan steals 50% of healing and regeneration effects on them.
Cost: 80 mana
Cooldown: 16/14/12/10/8 seconds
Duration:5 seconds
Damage (magic): 15/25/35/45/55 (+0.3*AP) per second
Awesome. :0

Stealing stats and the like is something I like to see more of, especially for something like straight heals.

However, a few more questions. What's the range? Exactly /how/ does this move spread? Is the 0.3 the accumulated ratio or what happens every second? What happens if the target is Ignited or has Grievous Wounds? Does Desaan get the full heal amount, or only what the champion would have received after the Healing Reduction?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryypter View Post
E - Nether Shield: Desaan places a shield of void energies on an ally, absorbing damage and silencing enemies who attack the shielded unit.

Cost: 100 mana
Cooldown: 14/13/12/11/10
Shield Strength: 50/100/150/200/250 (+0.6*AP)
Shield Duration: 4 seconds
Silence Duration: 2 seconds
A silencing shield? Sweet. Maybe hike the mana cost a little? That aside, it's pretty cool. :3

A few of the same questions as before. What is the range? Can he cast it on himself? Etc.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cryypter View Post
R - Void Portal: Desaan creates a nether portal between two locations, allowing units to travel instantly between each end. Enemy units which pass through it will take true damage (can only be damaged once this way).

Cost: 150/200/250 mana
Cooldown: 100 seconds
Duration: 5 seconds
Range: 600/850/1100
Damage: 200/300/400 (+0.3 AP)
My initial impression is that it's a fine and dandy move; something that hasn't really been done before. But, then I thought for a moment. This move enables more shenanigans and possible griefing than I can imagine. The problem with a move like this is that, if the range is too short, it's night useless. If the range is too long, then the it's OP since you can chill safely in base and then jump out to baron whenever. I don't even know where to begin with something this powerful or what would happen if you put the portal on top of blue buff or something ("I steal your blue from across the map hue").

Overall, he looks pretty decent as a support/mage. He reminds me a little bit of Morgana, especially with the shield. The most glaring issue is the ultimate, as it can be...a monster to deal with, balance wise (pun intended >:3).


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Cryypter

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Senior Member

02-17-2012

Thanks for taking the time to look at him.

Quote:
Originally Posted by evawin View Post
Void champion, hm? HEAVEN OR HELL! DUEL 1! LET'S ROCK!
Umm... thanks? XD

Quote:
Mainly, I changed king to ruler since being the "king" of a small, minor city-state doesn't sound quite right.
"Monarch" simply means "single ruler", so it gives more detail than just "ruler". (btw, Monaco has a monarch, and it is the second smallest country in the world.)

Quote:
The second paragraph is fairly cluttered and rushed by comparison to the first. You went into a good degree of detail about his job prior to the Void, but then skip over the Void portion to "and then he became a monster and is now in the League". Perhaps if you reduce the first and add that space to the second?
Yeah, I forgot I hadn't finished the Lore when I posted this, so I kinda just threw down a quick summary of what was in my head. I plan to go back and rewrite this.



Quote:
Pretty solid ability; kind of reminds me of Maokai in a sense. However, this feels like it can be either very weak or very strong (being paired with someone like Sona for free mana everywhere! ). If I were you, I would make it more like Maokai's ult with a stack system but restoring percentage mana; however, that's just me. :P
I don't quite get the comparison to Maokai's ult; did you mean his passive? If so, the difference is Mao's passive requires something to trigger it (i.e. an autoattack). Desaan is a support though, not a tank, so requiring him to get in autoattack range might not be a good idea.



Quote:
A siphoning system; pretty neat. :3

My biggest issue is the Speed bonus per stack. that's 45% movement on top of the 30% slow that your target has. Maybe toning down the bonus MS would be in order... In addition, it took me a few read-throughs, but I realized that the stack duration was 3 seconds. Having the ability be immediately active for healing purposes after significantly damaging an enemy seems very abusable; I would get rid of the bonus movement speed per stack, increase the stack duration past the cooldown of the move, and then give both the heal and the drain the same cooldown. It's already nuking one person which, in lane, is good enough especially with a flat 30% slow (Nunu is crying tears of sadness from what life was like before his nerfs); on top of that, it can be used to simultaneously heal someone or a rather hefty amount? I think this single move has a little too much going on.
Ah, I'm afraid you misunderstood this ability. First, the stacks don't expire; you keep them until you use it on an ally. The 3 second duration is how long the drain effect lasts (I'll reword that to "Channel" instead of "Duration" to make it clearer). The 10 seconds is the cooldown once the drain has ended. So to get the 45% speed boost, he has to drain an enemy 3 times for the full duration, and he has to wait till the drain ends (or break it himself) before he can boost an ally. Btw, you do realize Nunu's slow ranges from 20% to 60%?

Quote:
Mechanics aside, I have a few questions, though. Can Desaan move while the appendage is attached, or does he have to sit and treat it like a channel? What's the range? The 0.5 AP has an asterisk next to it, which I don't exactly know what that means. Does it mean that the 0.5 AP ratio is showing the maximum AP ratio after 10 seconds? Or is it really 0.5 AP per second, stacking up to 5 AP after 10 seconds? :x
Desaan can't move while channeling. Apparently I forgot to put ranges on most of the abilities. The asterisk means multiplication (thought it's mostly used in computer programming, so it's understandable you might not know that), and that is an error. I was thinking of the ratio for the full duration, so I'll need to convert that to a per second ratio.



Quote:
Awesome. :0

Stealing stats and the like is something I like to see more of, especially for something like straight heals.

However, a few more questions. What's the range? Exactly /how/ does this move spread? Is the 0.3 the accumulated ratio or what happens every second? What happens if the target is Ignited or has Grievous Wounds? Does Desaan get the full heal amount, or only what the champion would have received after the Healing Reduction?
I forgot to explain the spread effect, but I'm actually glad I did, because I just thought of something: This should be able to target allies, making them carriers. They wouldn't be affected, but they could spread the parasites to enemies. Would also work to discourage enemies from attacking whoever you cast it on. I may need to scale back some of the effects to compensate. Anyway, if enemies stand near the target for a certain duration, the parasites spread to them. They won't spread to a unit that was already infected, though. About ignite, I didn't think about that. I think currently all healing reduction effects are the same, so it wouldn't be affected by ignite.


Quote:
A silencing shield? Sweet. Maybe hike the mana cost a little? That aside, it's pretty cool. :3

A few of the same questions as before. What is the range? Can he cast it on himself? Etc.
Is there a specific reason why you think the mana should be higher? It's actually fairly high compared to other shields (Galio, Lux, Orianna - 60, Janna - 70-110, Karma - 70-120) And it actually has rather low shield health at early levels.


Quote:
My initial impression is that it's a fine and dandy move; something that hasn't really been done before. But, then I thought for a moment. This move enables more shenanigans and possible griefing than I can imagine. The problem with a move like this is that, if the range is too short, it's night useless. If the range is too long, then the it's OP since you can chill safely in base and then jump out to baron whenever. I don't even know where to begin with something this powerful or what would happen if you put the portal on top of blue buff or something ("I steal your blue from across the map hue").
This ability I actually did list a range for, and it is much shorter than anything you mentioned. 1100 units is the range of Anivia's Q, which will almost reach from one bush in mid lane to the other. The main use of this is that it basically gives your entire team a blink. Amumu doesn't need flash to initiate; Fiddle can appear from behind your team into the middle of theirs; you could save an ally trapped behind a wall. But it requires good placement and timing, and enemies can pass through it into the middle of your team if they think it is worth the damage.


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Still Eternity

Senior Member

02-18-2012

Hello Crypter, as a favor for offering to review my champion, I shall of course do in turn and review yours.

Lore: It's got good footing, I like how it's set up, but I feel that Desaan just "discovering" the Void is a bit drab. I would think having him come in contact with some sort of artifact or creature or anything really would make a bit more sense as to why he becomes so zealous about the Void. I understand he does things for espionage, it looks like, but I feel there needs to be a more concrete reason as to why he goes hunting after Void Magic of all things.

Also, I would like to know why he chose to partake in the League. It doesn't have to be drawn out, just say a quick blurb about why he's there. Just to y'know, make things totally crystal clear.

Everything else sounds good though!

Base Stats: Well, there aren't any! I'm sure you just haven't come up with them yet. This isn't the most pressing issue, but having an idea how your Champion starts/scales makes reviewing a bit easier.

Quote:
Innate - Absorption: Desaan regains 10/16/22 mana for each spell cast near him. Cannot occur more than once every second. Increases at lvl 7 & 13.
I like this for a Passive, as it gives Desaan a nice amount of mana sustain so he can cast his spells. It isn't Soraka high, which is good, but I feel it should be changed to % Mana instead, as early game in the correct circumstances, it'll be super tough to drive him out of lane for mana reasons. Honestly, a low % is likely the way to go. Flat would be a bit either too weak or too strong in the right/wrong set-ups.

Quote:
Q - Leech: Desaan latches an appendage onto a target. If used on an enemy, it drains energy from the target which damages and slows them over 3 seconds, storing 1 stack per second (max 9 stacks). If used on an ally, it injects the drained energy, instantly healing them and granting a burst of speed based on the number of stacks.

Cost: 60/70/80/90/100 mana
Cooldown: 10 seconds for drain, none for heal
Channel Duration: 3 seconds
Damage (magic): 20/35/50/65/80 (+0.15*AP) per second
Slow: 30%
Heal: 20/30/40/50/60 (+0.15*AP) per stack
Speed Bonus: 5% per stack
Cast Range:600
Leash Range:800
So he have,
~Harass Tool
~Ally Heal
~Ally Haste
~Enemy Slow
~Stack System

That's a lot of things for one spell. Usually it's a good idea to let no more than three things happen with any single ability, otherwise the skill in question becomes over-complex than what it has to be. The slow is decent enough, why does the same skill need to haste? Kayle's Heal slows/hastes, but it doesn't do damage and slow too. It's a combo Nunu Iceball + Kayle heal, actually, with a cool tether-stack concept added in.

TBH, the more things your ability does, the harder to balance. I would change this ability a bit, make it more sleek. I like the whole Stack-Harass, then Heal ally idea, as it promotes a Risk/Reward for being aggressive, in that you can heal your ally afterwords, but the risk being you could take damage for getting close. I would either gut the slow, or gut the haste. You don't need both on this ability.

Quote:
W - Infestation: Desaan infests the target with void parasites for 5 seconds. If enemies stay near an infested unit for 1 second, the parasites will spread to them. If the infested units are enemies, they take damage and Desaan steals 50% of healing and regeneration effects on them.
Cost: 80 mana
Cooldown: 16/14/12/10/8 seconds
Duration:5 seconds
Damage (magic): 15/25/35/45/55 (+0.3*AP) per second
Cast Range:750
Spread Range: 175
This is a neat ability. So it's basically,
~Area Denial, (They won't want to come near any carriers)
~Advanced Regeneration (On yourself)
~Smidge of Damage

I actually like this ability, as it does what an aggressive support like this character seems should do. It creates an active field of "DO NOT GO HERE" and punishes poor plays by enemies while rewarding you. Bit concerned with the amount of sustain this will have in tandem with your passive, as it seems you could have an overload of sustain here (Which is exactly what Soraka Was nerfed for) However, it is a lot closer to balanced, as some of your sustain requires to get into harm's way. I cannot truely say if the sustain seems OP or not, this would be more a matter of "Needs to be tested in-game" than number crunching.

Overall, nicely done here. Not much I would change without actually seeing in a test realm.

Quote:
E - Nether Shield: Desaan places a shield of void energies on an ally, absorbing damage and silencing enemies who attack the shielded unit.

Cost: 100 mana
Cooldown: 14/13/12/11/10
Shield Strength: 50/100/150/200/250 (+0.6*AP)
Shield Duration: 4 seconds
Silence Duration: 2 seconds
Cast Range: 650
So a shield hmm? This shield,
~Shields from Damage (Durrrrr)
~Silences enemies who attack it

Ah, you keep in tradition with the Void, a Silence Ability. Much approval here.

Good all-around shield ability, although between a shield and heal, this character is nearing too much sustain. Again though, your heal requires you to get into danger, and it isn't all that much unless you get full stacks, and to get it, that's a lot of expended mana.

Once again, you've balanced the abilities fairly well. I cannot say for certain unless I could test it. So until we can beta-test champion ideas, this shield gets an O-K from me.

Quote:
R - Void Portal: Desaan creates a nether portal between two locations, allowing units to travel instantly between each end. Enemy units which pass through it will take true damage (can only be damaged once this way).

Cost: 150/200/250 mana
Cooldown: 100 seconds
Duration: 5 seconds
Distance Between Portals: 600/850/1100
Cast Range:
Damage: 200/300/400 (+0.3 AP)
I have actually really been wanting an ability like this to be inserted into the League, as there are no actual "Portal" Champions, just basic blinks and dashes. I like that you allow enemies to travel through it, which creates counterplay if indeed they decide they could tank the damage, although I think that it being True Damage is overkill on a Support. There's literally no reason for it to deal True Damage, even though the damage isn't very high.

Overall: I like your champion good sir, you've got a very nicely done Aggressive Support here, which is something I can appreciate. It's basically at the stage where balance can only be ascertained via a test realm, so that's a good sign. It's a wonderful concept and only has a few things to smooth out.

However, I do indeed insist that your Q does too many things, and that something should be cut, be it the haste, slow, or even the heal if you chose. Your Passive I would myself change to % regeneration, as Flat tends to be either extremely weak or extremely strong. And finally, there's no real reason why your Ultimate needs to deal True Damage, especially on a Support Champion. I understand you want your enemies to seriously consider taking all that damage, and it's a good idea, but still, True Damage is both a bit much on many characters (especially on Supports!), as it is notoriously hard to balance and creates little counter-play aside form HP stacking. There's really no reason why it shouldn't be Magic Damage, and you should seriously consider changing it.

You have a very nice Champion here sir! T'was splendid reading it, as you've thought out a lot of the balance and he seems genuinely fun to play.

Have a wonderful Morning/Noon/Night,
~Still Eternity.


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Flamell

Senior Member

02-18-2012

Since everyone else hit this pretty well and all that I will keep mine short with the questions that haven't been asked.
All my questions/analyses pertain to the Ult Everything else seems pretty awesome.

1.) How large of an area is the portal?
2.) How does the portal work? does it auto set the second portal? Does it work similar to like say a rumble ultimate where you have a line indicator and it sets the portals at the correct ranges? Or do you have to manually set the second portal?
3.) I would definitely increase the cooldown, with the amount of utility this gives its cooldown is a little low. I would do something like Sona's which is 140,120,100
4.)I would, like some others have stated, change your ultimate from true damage to magic damage and increase the ratio to something like .6 AP.
5.) this one I am not completely confident is needed but I will put it here anyway. I feel the distance of the portals is a tad high. I would bring it down to something like 600/750/900.


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Cryypter

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Senior Member

02-18-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Still Eternity View Post
Hello Crypter, as a favor for offering to review my champion, I shall of course do in turn and review yours.
Thank you for your input. Unfortunately, you are 9th in line for a review, but I will make an exception since you are participating in a contest and have a deadline.


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Lore: It's got good footing, I like how it's set up, but I feel that Desaan just "discovering" the Void is a bit drab. I would think having him come in contact with some sort of artifact or creature or anything really would make a bit more sense as to why he becomes so zealous about the Void. I understand he does things for espionage, it looks like, but I feel there needs to be a more concrete reason as to why he goes hunting after Void Magic of all things.
He wasn't really "hunting" for it, he stumbled on it. And the thing is, how you go about discovering the Void hasn't really been explained well in the existing Lore, and I think purposefully so. The Void is supposed to be mysterious, so going into great detail about it might be counterproductive, but if I can think of a good explanation that maintains the mystery, I'll certainly take your advice.

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Also, I would like to know why he chose to partake in the League. It doesn't have to be drawn out, just say a quick blurb about why he's there. Just to y'know, make things totally crystal clear.
The second paragraph is slated for revision, as it was kind of rushed. He is in the League for the same reason Cho'gath, Brand, and several others are: he's dangerous and the Institute of War would rather make good use out of him than leave him to rot in a cell.

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Base Stats: Well, there aren't any! I'm sure you just haven't come up with them yet. This isn't the most pressing issue, but having an idea how your Champion starts/scales makes reviewing a bit easier.
Yeah... I don't really mess with base stats, because they are very hard to balance without actual testing. The most I do is the Spell/Health/Damage/Difficulty bars, since they give about as much info, which I will add momentarily.


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I like this for a Passive, as it gives Desaan a nice amount of mana sustain so he can cast his spells. It isn't Soraka high, which is good, but I feel it should be changed to % Mana instead, as early game in the correct circumstances, it'll be super tough to drive him out of lane for mana reasons. Honestly, a low % is likely the way to go. Flat would be a bit either too weak or too strong in the right/wrong set-ups.
You have a point about the percentage thing, since that naturally scales as the game progresses. I'll need to figure out a good percentage...


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So he have,
~Harass Tool
~Ally Heal
~Ally Haste
~Enemy Slow
~Stack System

That's a lot of things for one spell. Usually it's a good idea to let no more than three things happen with any single ability, otherwise the skill in question becomes over-complex than what it has to be. The slow is decent enough, why does the same skill need to haste? Kayle's Heal slows/hastes, but it doesn't do damage and slow too. It's a combo Nunu Iceball + Kayle heal, actually, with a cool tether-stack concept added in.

TBH, the more things your ability does, the harder to balance. I would change this ability a bit, make it more sleek. I like the whole Stack-Harass, then Heal ally idea, as it promotes a Risk/Reward for being aggressive, in that you can heal your ally afterwords, but the risk being you could take damage for getting close. I would either gut the slow, or gut the haste. You don't need both on this ability.
I can understand where you're coming from, but the point of this spell was that it does the opposite to allies that it does to enemies, which fits the theme. My original version of this ability linked an ally and an enemy directly, but having the effects simultaneous made it too powerful, so I made it so you had to wait till the debuff ended before you could buff. I figured it would feel like fewer effects since they're so similar: + health & speed for allies, - health & speed for enemies. And there are several limiting factors that reduce it's power: the slow is much less than Nunu's (30% vs 20-60%) as is the damage, it requires you to stay tethered, and the heal is dependent on first draining an enemy.
While you have a good argument, and I agree with you in the general case, I think that there can be exceptions, such as Lee Sin and Shaco. The reason it works for them is the effects have cohesion in their purpose. Lee Sin's W is a prime example. It has 6 effects (self shield, dash, ally shield, lifesteal, spell vamp, and armor), but they have two distinct purposes: save you and an ally, and increase your defenses/sustain.

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This is a neat ability. So it's basically,
~Area Denial, (They won't want to come near any carriers)
~Advanced Regeneration (On yourself)
~Smidge of Damage

I actually like this ability, as it does what an aggressive support like this character seems should do. It creates an active field of "DO NOT GO HERE" and punishes poor plays by enemies while rewarding you. Bit concerned with the amount of sustain this will have in tandem with your passive, as it seems you could have an overload of sustain here (Which is exactly what Soraka Was nerfed for) However, it is a lot closer to balanced, as some of your sustain requires to get into harm's way. I cannot truely say if the sustain seems OP or not, this would be more a matter of "Needs to be tested in-game" than number crunching.

Overall, nicely done here. Not much I would change without actually seeing in a test realm.
I wanted Desaan's sustain to scale with his enemies' sustain, so the longer they can stay in lane, the longer you can, but It also means you can't sustain without other people there. The numbers would have to be tested though, as you mentioned, to keep it from being too powerful.



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Ah, you keep in tradition with the Void, a Silence Ability. Much approval here.
I'm something of a Void aficionado, if I do say so myself. I'm glad I'm not the only one who pays attention to little details like that.


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I have actually really been wanting an ability like this to be inserted into the League, as there are no actual "Portal" Champions, just basic blinks and dashes. I like that you allow enemies to travel through it, which creates counterplay if indeed they decide they could tank the damage, although I think that it being True Damage is overkill on a Support. There's literally no reason for it to deal True Damage, even though the damage isn't very high.
The reason I did true damage was to somewhat limit enemy tanks ability to use the portal with impunity. If it was high enough magic damage that tanks needed to worry about it, I think it would be overkill to a squishy. True damage levels the playing field a little. It's also not a reliable source of damage, so you won't really be using it for the damage very much.


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Cryypter

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Senior Member

02-19-2012

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Originally Posted by Flamell View Post
Since everyone else hit this pretty well and all that I will keep mine short with the questions that haven't been asked.
All my questions/analyses pertain to the Ult Everything else seems pretty awesome.
Thank's for your input.

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1.) How large of an area is the portal?
It acts basically like a line, which teleports you if you walk through it. It's probably about the same width as the entrance to Dragon (though I should put in some numbers).

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2.) How does the portal work? does it auto set the second portal? Does it work similar to like say a rumble ultimate where you have a line indicator and it sets the portals at the correct ranges? Or do you have to manually set the second portal?
It would have a vector targeting system like Rumble's ult and Viktor's E, but would have an adjustable range like Shyvana's ult.

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3.) I would definitely increase the cooldown, with the amount of utility this gives its cooldown is a little low. I would do something like Sona's which is 140,120,100
Makes sense, though I would like to compare the cooldowns of some more skills with similar utility level.

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4.)I would, like some others have stated, change your ultimate from true damage to magic damage and increase the ratio to something like .6 AP.
The reason I did true damage was to somewhat limit enemy tanks ability to use the portal with impunity. If it was high enough magic damage that tanks needed worry about it, I think it would be overkill to a squishy. True damage levels the playing field a little. It's also not a reliable source of damage, so you won't really be using it for the damage very much.

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5.) this one I am not completely confident is needed but I will put it here anyway. I feel the distance of the portals is a tad high. I would bring it down to something like 600/750/900.
I still don't quite have the best feel for how the numbers translate into distance in game, but I think this type of thing is small enough that it would need testing to balance.


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Flamell

Senior Member

02-19-2012

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Originally Posted by Cryypter View Post

The reason I did true damage was to somewhat limit enemy tanks ability to use the portal with impunity. If it was high enough magic damage that tanks needed worry about it, I think it would be overkill to a squishy. True damage levels the playing field a little. It's also not a reliable source of damage, so you won't really be using it for the damage very much.
The problem with this is you are not exchanging utility with damage. Your ultimate is giving a very large amount of utility at the same time it has the potential to do a lot of damage. Which is why I suggest changing it to Magic damage and increasing the ratio a bit.