LordHippoman Writes Haikus About Every Champion In The Game

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LordHippoman

Senior Member

05-19-2012

Ahri

I don't play Ahri
I know she has glowing balls
Face her glowing balls

Ahri charms Kog'Maw
And then her face just melts off
Poor, poor Ahri's face

Ahri uses flash
Flashes again and again
And then another


Akali

Bursting from shadows
Suddenly, Hextech Gunblade
We need to nerf it.

Akali has scythes.
I'm pretty sure they are scythes.
What is a kama.

Ninjas have cool hoods
Akali doesn't know that
Invest in a hood.

UPDATING SPORADICALLY OFTEN


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dPolly

Senior Member

05-19-2012

Ahri must have some pretty particular appetites, charming people like that all the time.


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LordHippoman

Senior Member

05-21-2012

Alistar

Oh my God, support
But he can jungle also
Versatility

So, can you do it?
The Q W combo?
I know I can't.

Pop your Ultimate
The towers, they do nothing
Mad cow on the loose.

Amumu

Amumu cries lots
But then suddenly, he ults
Then you start crying

He is a Yordle
Amumu's not a midget
Sorry, height challenged

Bandage Toss, Tantrum
Then Curse of The Sad Mummy
Where did my health go?

Anivia

Have you heard the word?
About the bird? Bird Bird Bird
Bird Bird is the word

She uses mana
And she uses it alot
Better snag Chalice

So, if she can fly
Why do Teemo's shrooms hurt her?
L O L logic.


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LordHippoman

Senior Member

05-21-2012

Annie

Is she level 6?
What does that white aura mean?
I don't OH GOD BEARS!

So, have you seen it?
Annie's Bear Tibbers? It's big.
Might be behind you...

You smell like burning.
Ignite, followed by a stun.
Feel the heat yet?

Ashe

I hope this gank works.
I would rather not get stunned.
What's that on the map?

Queen of Freijlord
Master of the Frost Arrow.
Everyone's first champ.

She's easy to play.
A great starter champion.
I really like Ashe.

Blitzcrank

Pulling them closer
Silencing them with his Ult
Overdrive and flee.

Zaun built Steam Golem
With an individual's mind
Blitzcrank serves noone

Hide behind minions.
Hide amongst the broad bushes.
That hook will find you.


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Blaine Tog

Senior Member

05-22-2012

These are very amusing. One pet peeve of mine: Haiku's don't have to be 5-7-5 in English.


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tom641

Senior Member

05-22-2012

This is awesome, keep it up!


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LordHippoman

Senior Member

05-23-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blaine Tog View Post
These are very amusing. One pet peeve of mine: Haiku's don't have to be 5-7-5 in English.
I know, I'm just sticking with the traditional way that's familiar to people.

Anywhoooo,

Brand

One more fire champ?
I'm perfectly fine with that.
Mega Man has 8.

That awkward moment
When Brand's ult bounces 5 times
And hits the minions.

Aim those skillshots well
They won't dodge Pillar of Flame
Go in for the stun


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Magma Armor0

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Senior Member

05-23-2012

lol this is awesome. keep it up


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LordHippoman

Senior Member

05-24-2012

Caitlyn

Camping the bushes
And Charging up her passive
Ah ha! Boom, Headshot.

Piltover's Sherrif
Shootin' **** with a rifle
Also likes cupcakes

Caitlyn lays down traps
I'm pretty bad with that skill
Are they used like wards?


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LordHippoman

Senior Member

05-26-2012

Cassiopiea

Cassiopiea
Her name has five syllables.
Cassiopiea

Used to be a joke.
Then buffs made her popular.
So who's laughing now?

Don't look at her face.
Click the other way, run, now!
Or you will be stoned!

Cho-Gath

The OV Hero.
That means "Original Void"
And not Ovaries.

Ground quakes, spirit breaks.
Cho'Gath's infamous Rupture.
Another life takes.

Come closer to me.
You sure are looking tasty.
It's time for a Feast.

Corki

Oh my god, oh, oh
I love Corki so **** much
Dat Helicopter.

Corki's great mustache.
Is his hidden passive. Why?
It distracts people.

Phosphorous Bomb run.
Got em running back to base.
Valkyrie, First Blood.

Darius

New champ coming in.
I hope you are all ready.
Heads up, here he comes.

Strolling down the lane.
Decimation follows you.
Pull them close and chop.

Top lane isn't safe.
When the Guillotine comes down.
Teamfight multi-kills.

Dr. Mundo

Mundo's haikus have as many
syllables in them as
he pleases.

Infected Cleaver!
It's a skillshot nuke and slow!
The Doctor is in.

Saving us money.
He puts champs and skins on sale.
What a great fellow.

Evelynn

If you're reading this
And Evelynn doesn't suck
Welcome to Future.

Go play with their fears.
Eve MIA? Take your time.
Feed on their panic.

Here I am, Farming
Oracle ward? What is that?
Hope I don't get gan-