Tonight on Teemo Tonight, Teemo

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JHUB3R

Member

03-27-2012

Teemo needs more skins!


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Nip the Zephyr

Senior Member

03-28-2012

Bump


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JHUB3R

Member

03-31-2012

Teemo is so overpowered that he deserves a bump for a new segment to be written


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T174N

Member

03-31-2012

this made me lol so hard, to many QQ about teemo being UP or OP, he is neither, get over it like all champs if played right he owns noobs


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Pyronymer

Senior Member

04-01-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by T174N View Post
this made me lol so hard, to many QQ about teemo being UP or OP, he is neither, get over it like all champs if played right he owns noobs
Teemo : And welcome to Teemo Tonight! Breaking News! If played right Teemo owns noobs!
Bader Teemo : Right as ever Teemo! If played in a completely non-specified way Teemo is exceptionally good against new players unfamiliar with the game, and also against idiots of all types. And as we mentioned earlier Teemo actually exudes gamma radiation that turns all opposing players into noobs and idiots, since, after all, if he didn't do that he would be a really mediocre champ.
Teemo : Mediocre indeed, but thanks to owning noobs when played right did you know that Teemo is not merely better than non-viable, he is in fact both not UP and not OP! He is in fact PERFECT due SOLELY to the fact that he can "own" the WORST most inexperienced players in the league!
Tristana : As long as you build him right. Remember to build him right, or for some unknown reason that couldn't possibly be his horrible weakness as a champ Teemo cannot even beat the worst players in the game. I repeat, remember to build Teemo "right" or he cannot even "own noobs".
Badger Teemo : I dispute this "just right" thing. I say his highly conditional ability to "own noobs" if "built right" actually makes him OP! The OP KING OF LoL that ALL players fear! (which is strange since he only owns noobs conditionally, but still EVERYONE FEARS HIM!)
Teemo : To discuss this pressing issue we have invited tonight's special guest, the unquestionably manly, Ezreal!
Lux : You little ******er what did you just *****ing call me! AAAAAAEEEEIIIII !
Teemo : Arrrgh! ... Excuse me Mr Ezreal you seem to be strangling me for.... aaack... some reason...
Lux : Die you horrid little vermin die!
Teemo : Ack!... Is it because that one time I accidentally thought you were Gay? I'm sorry Mr Ezreal... ack... it's because you wear such a fabulous gay man outfit that I thought you must be a fabulous gay man... gack!... urk!
Lux : Fabulous this you little...
Teemo : Gark... why won't any of my fabulous scout powers save me from ... urk... Mr Ezreal's powerful manly grip,... Qark!
Badger Teemo : Have you tried your move quick active?
Teemo : Urk.... manly grip CC isn't cancelled by move quick, move quick on 22 second cool down left... too much man power!
Lux : How dare you! Man power? Try on my on hit magic damage that is superior to yours in all ways like effect procs that you don't do at all!
Teemo : Gurk! ...strangling me with added magic damage... ark... Blinding dart utterly inneffective against everyone... mushrooms on 35 second cooldown on other side of map...
Badger Teemo : Try toxic shot!
Teemo :...
Ezreal :
Oh hi guys, what's happening, my bronies!
Badger Teemo : Oh hi Miss Lady Lux!
Ezreal : AAAAAEEEEIIIIH, I will scratch your ****ing eyes out you biatch!
Badger Teemo : Eeek!
Teemo : Gurk!
Tristana : And that ends tonight's episode of Teemo Tonight. So good luck all you Teemo Players in your... literally dozens world wide as you continue to highly conditionally maybe perhaps beat only the worst players in the League!


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Basil Ali

Senior Member

04-09-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pyronymer View Post
Karthus : They aren't free, they cost you an ultimate...
Teemo : Erm? What's an ultimate?
LOL, This is defiantly how I feel when I play with Teemo!


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Pyronymer

Senior Member

04-17-2012

Teemo : Tonight on a very special Teemo Tonight...
Badger Teemo : We have exactly 100 up votes on this thread's first post, Yay!
Tristana : Huzzah.
Karthus : Whoop Dee Do.
Heimerdinger : I hear the little rats are getting a tiny "bug fix" though.
Teemo : It's not a tiny bug fix it is the most massive buff eva!
Heimerdinger : They're having some sort of DoT reset fix so that they do MAYBE about 30 base magic damage per second (not per hit) extra with a maxed out Toxic shot. It's really rather unremarkable.
Badger Teemo : It's the biggest giantest damage buff eva! I will stand still for 5 seconds shooting 1 target and deal massive amounts of extra damage!
Karthus : Well no, it's not massive even then, and if you do that you will DIE. Trust me on this death thing.
Teemo : And there are other buffs!
Tristana : Well. Those are almost rumors and are somewhat questionable and vague. The patch has been delayed, probably because changing Teemo confuses and angers the alcoholic manic depressive chimps employed as the Riot Game Balance Department. We've even had a hoax that the changes would include another massive nerf to mushrooms, and the sad thing is that the way they treat Teemo changes a reduction in mushroom duration to 3 minutes sounds EXACTLY like the sort of "buff counter balance" they would include to "make up for" reducing his incredibly poor move steroid cooldown to an amount which is STILL massively long compared to far superior abilities.
Heimerdinger : Not to mention that what leaked patch notes we currently have didn't include a mention of Teemo at all.
Badger Teemo : But maybes they is going to buff Teemo by larger amounts, I mean the promises are vague and stuff so maybe they will buff him by BIGGER amounts and in MORE ways!
Tristana : What like reversing the massive nerfs to mushroom drop rate and damage? So that it can again actually kill creeps late game or have any half decent effect like it did back when Teemo was STILL only barely viable in normal games and not in Ranked outside of the hands of a single player?
Teemo : Yeah. That thing. What if they do that thing?
Karthus : Sigh. Poor little buddy. They are NEVER going to give you that sort of power, Riot hates you. You will get your so called "bug fix" that isn't really a bug fix unless Riot's programmers and game balancers never even spent 5 minutes on your DPS calculations, and you might get a few seconds of move quick. But you will NOT be made viable. They will not even reverse the specific nerfs that moved you from "almost viable" to "not even viable in normal matches". Not until they have had their faces rubbed in their wrong decision on mushrooms that they were warned about at the time for another six months or more. And even then they won't REALLY fix you.
Tristana : Yeah the BEST you can hope for is in an attempt NOT to fix you properly they hare off and give you some random new bull**** little ability which by their sheer incompetence accidentally happens to be wildly powerful. Only THEN will you gain real ultimate power little Teemo.
Teemo : But I already HAVE real ultimate power. I am Teemo, lord of LoL and I have 100 upvotes on my TV show that I star in five times at once!
Badger Teemo : That's only because every other champion in the game fears you and each additional new champion is forced to vote for us!
Teemo : Ooh so are there a hundred champions now?
Karthus : I don't know I stopped counting back when no one ever picked me ever again.


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Chaede

Senior Member

04-18-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pyronymer View Post
Teemo : Tonight on a very special Teemo Tonight...
Badger Teemo : We have exactly 100 up votes on this thread's first post, Yay!
Tristana : Huzzah.
Karthus : Whoop Dee Do.
Heimerdinger : I hear the little rats are getting a tiny "bug fix" though.
Teemo : It's not a tiny bug fix it is the most massive buff eva!
Heimerdinger : They're having some sort of DoT reset fix so that they do MAYBE about 30 base magic damage per second (not per hit) extra with a maxed out Toxic shot. It's really rather unremarkable.
Badger Teemo : It's the biggest giantest damage buff eva! I will stand still for 5 seconds shooting 1 target and deal massive amounts of extra damage!
Karthus : Well no, it's not massive even then, and if you do that you will DIE. Trust me on this death thing.
Teemo : And there are other buffs!
Tristana : Well. Those are almost rumors and are somewhat questionable and vague. The patch has been delayed, probably because changing Teemo confuses and angers the alcoholic manic depressive chimps employed as the Riot Game Balance Department. We've even had a hoax that the changes would include another massive nerf to mushrooms, and the sad thing is that the way they treat Teemo changes a reduction in mushroom duration to 3 minutes sounds EXACTLY like the sort of "buff counter balance" they would include to "make up for" reducing his incredibly poor move steroid cooldown to an amount which is STILL massively long compared to far superior abilities.
Heimerdinger : Not to mention that what leaked patch notes we currently have didn't include a mention of Teemo at all.
Badger Teemo : But maybes they is going to buff Teemo by larger amounts, I mean the promises are vague and stuff so maybe they will buff him by BIGGER amounts and in MORE ways!
Tristana : What like reversing the massive nerfs to mushroom drop rate and damage? So that it can again actually kill creeps late game or have any half decent effect like it did back when Teemo was STILL only barely viable in normal games and not in Ranked outside of the hands of a single player?
Teemo : Yeah. That thing. What if they do that thing?
Karthus : Sigh. Poor little buddy. They are NEVER going to give you that sort of power, Riot hates you. You will get your so called "bug fix" that isn't really a bug fix unless Riot's programmers and game balancers never even spent 5 minutes on your DPS calculations, and you might get a few seconds of move quick. But you will NOT be made viable. They will not even reverse the specific nerfs that moved you from "almost viable" to "not even viable in normal matches". Not until they have had their faces rubbed in their wrong decision on mushrooms that they were warned about at the time for another six months or more. And even then they won't REALLY fix you.
Tristana : Yeah the BEST you can hope for is in an attempt NOT to fix you properly they hare off and give you some random new bull**** little ability which by their sheer incompetence accidentally happens to be wildly powerful. Only THEN will you gain real ultimate power little Teemo.
Teemo : But I already HAVE real ultimate power. I am Teemo, lord of LoL and I have 100 upvotes on my TV show that I star in five times at once!
Badger Teemo : That's only because every other champion in the game fears you and each additional new champion is forced to vote for us!
Teemo : Ooh so are there a hundred champions now?
Karthus : I don't know I stopped counting back when no one ever picked me ever again.
So much truth in this.


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Yfrappefort

Senior Member

04-18-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Chaede View Post
So much truth in this.
No way! Morello said that his damage would go up significantly after the bug fix!!! *cough cough*


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Heterrook

Senior Member

04-18-2012

this was great, i think that seeing anyone get rank number one as a youdle pissed them off so much they had to make sure it never happend agian.