Maturity is defined by "Perspective"......(How to Improve Yourself)

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Doct0r Phil

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Senior Member

03-09-2013

This may be a long post, so I appologize ahead of time.

I work as a family counselor for a living, and one thing I have noticed over the years is that the people who make the best changes, most progress, and cross the most bridges are the people who have great perspective. I always wondered a way to define what being "mature" would be. In my observations, I believe, the more perspective a person has also wil define the level of maturity of that person as well.

"Perspective" in this way, means being able to see things outside of their own viewpoints, thoughts, feelings, and beliefs.

-A person with great perspective realizes that the world does not revolve around them.
-A person with great perspective desires to gain knowledge from others.
-A person with great perspective doesn't just live by the "golden rule" (treat others as you want to be treated) but they desire to treat others well. They want to care about how OTHER's want to be treated.
-A person with great perspective understands that they have weaknesses and blindspots. They desire to find those, work on them, and better themselves.
-A person with great perspective tends to be respected by others because he/she is always trying to "hear people out", "show interest in them", and is very respectful.
-A person with great perspective also realizes that they (as an individual) are the only person they can control. They can't change other people. ONLY THEMSELVES!
-A person with great perspective LISTEN's before they SPEAK. Heck, even the Bible says, "There is a time to be silent and a time to speak". Notice that "silent" is first.

To give examples:

-A 5 year old tends to have little perspective, they see a toy, they want the toy (toys make them happy). They don't think about the fact they got a toy yesterday, or that their parents have bills to pay and can't afford that toy, or that there are kids who have no toys that could use that toy more.
-Teenagers tends to have better perspective, but generally when it benefits them. They say phrases like, "Well, so and so's parents let them do this", or "You are only blaming me and not him/her". Things like that.
-Adults who have poor perspective tends to have poor marriages and relationships. They only focus on their needs and wants. They don't try to see from their partner's point of view. They don't listen. They don't WANT to change.

My point of writing this is to try and talk to the people being warned, banned, and permabanned. You have an oppurtunity to better yourself! You have an oppurtunity to be a mature person!

-Take what other's say (as advice here) seriously. Most of us are authentically trying to help you. We aren't trolls, believe it or not, we want to help!
-Look beyond what you think and feel. YOU may feel that your behaviors were "ok" but many other people (including a company) felt differently. You can stick to your guns OR you can try to understand WHY other's don't like playing games with you.
-Don't blame people. It doesn't matter what THEY did, it only matters on how YOU behave as an individual. Blaming never ends well.
-We don't need to hear excuses but we will listen to reasons. Reasons explain WHY you did what you did, but NEVER excuse what you did. If you excuse your behaviors, you aren't going to be open to change.
-With that being said, be OPEN and WILLING to change. Bottom line, if you do not change yourself, you will probably get banned permanently. If you actually desire to change, you will.

Have good perspective. Have maturity.
-Be positive
-Be encouraging
-Be helpful
-Be respectful
-Learn to control your actions and anger
-Be constructive
-Be kind


Bottom line, I don't believe that all of you who were banned are "bad people". I actually think you guys are probably really cool IRL. Unfortunately, in regards towards this game, you just have some small things that you may need to improve.

You can be a great person! Just try! You never know how a change (even within a video game) can help you elsewhere in your life.


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Zer0Kill

Senior Member

03-09-2013

Well said, Summoner. This is what we see a lot of on this forum in particular, and what the summoner's code tries to promote. Good post.


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Kitteh Shinobu

Member

03-09-2013

That part is so very true. ^_^ I'd give that a warm welcomming up vote. Banned people are still people, and I am sure if they and others read this guide, they'll come to understand what the summoner's code is really about. =3 meow


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Prandine

Senior Member

03-09-2013

Here here, well said my friend. I doubt that most people who need to read this will, but I can only hope that the people who actually do take the time to read this will take it to heart and strive to beter themselves because of that.

P.S. If you don't mind, I'd like to post this on some of the other sites I visit as well (I wil of course give credit to you for making this; I never try to take credit for things other people made).


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Doct0r Phil

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Senior Member

03-09-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by Prandine View Post
Here here, well said my friend. I doubt that most people who need to read this will, but I can only hope that the people who actually do take the time to read this will take it to heart and strive to beter themselves because of that.

P.S. If you don't mind, I'd like to post this on some of the other sites I visit as well (I wil of course give credit to you for making this; I never try to take credit for things other people made).
Don't mind at all bud :-)


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SimplyAlive

Senior Member

03-10-2013

Bump for great justice. You've said it very well.


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Prandine

Senior Member

03-10-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by Y0u D0ne G00fed View Post
Don't mind at all bud :-)
Thanks. I already got a reply on pirate101 central which you can see below.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Life
Nice post. I enjoy how in depth it is without seeming degrading or argumentative. You did an excellent job at getting to the point without rushing the article you created. I really hope people take the advice you have given, as it is advice that can help influence a person's future. Thanks for the post!


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Riverstyx201

Senior Member

03-10-2013

This is great. +1. Would upvote more if I could.


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Doct0r Phil

This user has referred a friend to League of Legends, click for more information

Senior Member

03-10-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by Prandine View Post
Thanks. I already got a reply on pirate101 central which you can see below.
Wow, hey, Thank You so much!

That was really cool of you to do that!


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Prandine

Senior Member

03-10-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by Y0u D0ne G00fed View Post
Wow, hey, Thank You so much!

That was really cool of you to do that!
Hey, no problem, I'm glad I was able to do it.


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