A Comprehensive List of Champions that Lift.

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Lead Death

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Senior Member

02-08-2013

People who bump threads definently lift.



Looking for a champion that lifts but don't know which ones do?

You have two options you could

A. Look at their arms (Because big arms = lifts)

or

B. Look at this guide!

I suggest the latter.




Ahri- Ahri's a girl, girls don't lift, they jog. Unless you're Vi, Vi lifts.

Akali- Didn't you even bother reading the last champion? Girls dont lift!

Alistar- Alistar doesn't lift because he's a bull, bulls eat grass.

Amumu- Amumu lifted so hard he died, therefore becoming a mummy that doesn't lift at all.

Anivia- Anivia wants to lift, she really does but her wings prevent her from picking up any weights therefore preventing her from lifting.

Annie- Annie isn't old enough to lift, and shes a girl. Probably later she'll jog to stay in shape.

Ashe- Ashe is too busy at archery practice to lift or jog, tho she is in shape.

Blitzcrank- Lifting makes you sweaty, sweat has salt in it, therefore causing blitzcrank to rust, that is why blitzcrank doesn't lift. Robots don't sweat, but the mere possibility of sweating scares Blitzcrank enough to where he doesn't lift. Doing the next best alternative, Blitzcrank recreationally grabs.

Brand- Brand can't lift, everytime he trys to pick up a weight it burns up, thereby preventing him from lifting.

Caitlyn- Caitlyn busts strong robbers that lift, but she herself does not lift.

Cassieopeia- Do to her being a girl and not having legs she can't lift or jog. Instead she enjoys tea.

Cho'Gath- Cho'gath lifts entire teams of champions with his Q. Does he lift weights? no.

Corki- Corki's a Yordle. Yorldes don't lift or jog, they eat bagels.

Darius- You would think with that big axe that Darius lifted, but nope he doesn't. Alternativly he plays basketball, and afterward enjoys a donut and coffee.

Diana- Diana doesn't jog or lift. She rushes.

Dr. Mundo*- He lifts.

Draven- Ohhhhh yeah Draven definently lifts.

Elise- Elise jogs alot! It does get quite expensive buying 4 pairs of running shoes. She doesn't mind however because as a girl, she loves shoes.

Evelynn- Jogs in highheels, and she hangs out on the street corners quite a bit too, tho I don't know what that's about.

Ezreal- Ezreals tiny arms can't even lift a map.

FiddleSticks- more life liftlesticks. Ironically enough for a man with sticks for arms.

Fiora- Fioras work-out program includes 4 sets of 50 Lunges with 24-36 hours of rest in between each workout.

Fizz- He tried to lift one time, got a little tired of it and instead ended up going to a superbowl party with his friends and got drunk on beers.

Galio- Does tons of sit-ups for rock-hard abs.

Gangplank- Have you seen this guys arms? Theyre freakin' huge! He lifts.

Garen- Garen lifts freeweights at his favorite Demacian gym. Him and his freinds bully the weaker smaller champions who can't lift as much.

Gragas- Also went to the superbowl party with Fizz and got drunk on beers.

Graves- Graves arms are huge, therefore he lifts.

Hecarim- Being a horse like Alistar he eats grass.

Heimerdinger- Heimerdinger invented a lifting machine to do all his lifting for him. Therefore he lifts by technicallity.

Irelia- Used to jog but got nerfed, now she just enjoys tea.

Janna- She lifts things with the power of wind! Unfortunately her wind isnt that strong so she can't lift anything.

Jarvan IV- Have you seen this guy? He lifts like crazy.

Jax- Imagine if he actually lifted?

Jayce- Jayce lifts. His favorite exersize is hammer curls.

Karthus- Unlike Amumu after dying Karthus continued lifting for.. 7 seconds or so.

Kassadin- This guy lifts so hard he breaks entire dimensions. He lifted past the event horizon. Plus look at his arms, they're gigantic! You have been warned. edit: I'm also told that he rifts.

Katarina- Goes shoe shopping with Elise on her time off.

Kayle- Kayle flys, thereby eliminating the need to lift or jog.

Kennen- Enjoys his bagels with the other yordles.

Kha'zix- His lack of hands prevent him from lifting. Wishes he could lift without hands like Cho'gath, but can't, instead he crys in the corner.

Kog'maw- Kog'maw will perodically see Kha'zix crying, and will join him because like Kha'zix Kog'maw cant lift.

LeBlanc- Sends her clone to go jogging with the other girls while she actually just goes to the mall to shop for shoes with her best girlfreinds Elise and Katarina.

Lee Sin- He Lifts. However he focuses more on tone than bulk, doing high reps low weight over high weight low reps. He's also blind increasing his badass level by 10%.

Leona- She wanted to go Shoe shopping with the girls but wasn't invited because Garen thought she was hot and Katarina didn't like that. Leading to a big fight between Katarina and Leona, making it awkward for Elise to invite her while Kat's there. Garen and Leona still text once inawhile.

Lulu- Used to lift but got taken to an insane asylum because she was crazy as hell.

Lux- After getting way drunk on spiked punch Lux laughed inappropriately at Shens Superbowl party creating a really awkward moment. She was never invited again. She also doesn't lift.

Malphite- Rock hard abs/arms/pecs... pretty much everything. But he doesn't lift, he's just big naturally.

Malzahar- Like Kassadin he lifts, but not as much. He still lifts tho.

Maokai- Maokai is a tree. Tree's don't lift they photosensisize. Maokai loooooves photosensisizing, especially with Zyra woohoo!

Master Yi- Plays basketball against Darius and got dunked on. He got pretty pissed off to say the least.

Miss Fortune- Tried to Jog with the girls, got in a fight with Caitlyn somebody got shot, thats all I know. Evenlyn was getting arrested for something, I dont know..

Mordekaiser- He lifts. After lifting he kills a champion steals their soul and gets them to lift with him. He doesn't like to lift alone, he's weird like that.

Morgana- Got in a cat fight with Nidalee over whos shoes were cuter. Elise was there. Needless to say theyre too busy fighting

Nami- On the swim team with Fizz recreationally. Their coach is GangPlank.

Nasus- Lifts with his bro Renekton, he's all like "What's up dawg?" Nasus is all like "nuthin bro what's up with you?" Then they got pissed off at eacother and went to lift at differn't gyms.

Nautilus- Also on the swim team.

Nidalee- Cats don't lift. They claw.

Nocturne- As a spirit wraith death whisper thing his hands are opaque and just go through weights, therefore he can't lift.

Nunu- Nunu doesn't lift he's just naturally strong.

Olaf- He lifts.

Orianna- The Ball lifts, Orianna personally does not.

Pantheon- As a spartan training regiment Pantheon is required to lift atleast 4 times a week.

Poppy- She hates bagels, so instead she enjoys donuts and coffee with Darius.

Rammus- Rammus is ok.

Renekton- He got pissed off at his bro Nasus for lifting more than him, but yeah, he lifts.

Rengar- Rengar doesn't lift but he hunts down Champions that do lift.

Riven- She was left out from the jogging group and wasn't invited to go shoe shopping with Elise and her friends, so she stayed home and ate a galon of icecream.

Rumble- Rumble rides a mech, the mech doesn't lift because it's fragile from being made of junk.

Ryze- Look at Ryze, his Biceps are tiny, he doesn't lift.

Sejuani- Sejuani would like to think that mabey one day she could lift, but in reality it's not likely.

Shaco- He lifted so much it was deemed "mentaly unstable" So he was sent to an insane assylum where he got in a prison fight with Lulu and shanked her. She's still alive, just.. she isn't living well.

Shen- Used to watch his father lift all day. Not anymore tho, and he personally does not lift himself.

Shyvana- She's a dragon. Dragons lift, All dragons lift all the time, no exceptions!

Singed- Singed jogs... alot!

Sion- Sion lifted before he died. He doesn't lift much now however.

Sivir- She jogs.

Skarner- As a scorpion crystal monster thing Skarner prides himself in the fact that he's the only one of his kind that can and does infact lift. He uses special metal hand attachments to his claws in order to grip and lift the weights. It's complicated and requires alot of time and effort but technically "is" considered lifting. (not really)

Sona- Too busy playing string instruments and floating around to lift or jog.

Soraka- Doesn't lift.

Swain- He used to lift but after suffering a torn ACL injury he has retired from lifting.

Syndra- Lifts balls all day.

Talon- He lifts.

Taric- Too fabulous to lift.

Teemo- A ravenous little creature that congeiled in a gutter one dark stormy night. Legends are told of it's screeching battle cry that strikes terror into the hearts of little children "Never underestimate the power of the Scout's code." As scary and horrible as it is, it does not lift.

Thresh- He doesn't lift himself instead he spots other champions while they lift. What a nice guy!

Tristana- Just eats bagels.

Trundle- Lifting causes his skin to peel off and sends him in agony. Therefore he doesn't lift.

Tryndamere- Lifts only with his right arm. His left one he uses for other things.

Twisted Fate- He scammed a guy into lifting for him.

Twitch- Not a yordle, but not a human, he just enjoys tea instead of trying to lift.

Udyr- He lifts.

Urgot- Used to lift at his gym like a pro, but got bullied by Garen. Got his feelings hurt and now doesn't lift anymore. =(

Varus- Doesn't lift, instead competes with Taric to see who's more fabulous. Taric wins every time.

Vayne- Doesn't lift or jog, instead rolls everywhere she goes this rolling keeps her in shape.

Veigar- Too small to lift and too evil to enjoy bagels. Instead he just sits in the corner and thinks about how he could get back at the other champions for bullying him. He usually crys himself to sleep after that.

Vi- Only girl that lifts. Good for her! She also fists, tho I don't know what that's all about.

Viktor- You would think turning yourself into a machine would make you lift harder. For Viktor however it didn't work as his arms are still tiny.

Vladamir- I don't even know what this guys deal is. He just runs around and throws little balls of red that make quacking noises at you, hes a weird one alright.

Volibear- As the token armored bear champion and maskot of the league Volibear is too famous to lift.

Warwick- He fooled Annie one time by eating her grandma, she was pissed to say the least. Since that day he no longer lifts.

Wukong- Being a monkey he's 4 times stronger than a regular human. Eliminating the need for him to lift.

Xerath- Doesn't Lift. Just shoots lightning like a pro.

Xin Zhao- You would think he would lift, but no he does not.

Yorick- Occasionally lifts on his off days where he has nothing to do, other than that he doesn't usually lift.

Zed- Tried working out at the gym but kept geting picked on by Garen, got discouraged and never returned.

Ziggs- Got sent to the insane asylum with Lulu and Shaco. There it's against the rules to lift or enjoy bagels.

Zilean- Used to lift all the time, until Volibear moved in and got famous, now his hatred for Volibear has distracted him from being able to lift. Good thing he can just turn time backward and lift some more.

Zyra: Zyra and Maokai like to get together for some late night sessions and photosensysize together. It would be dangerous to interupt them.


There you have it! That's all the champions and weather or not they lift! Every single champion! I think... err, I might of forgot one.

I hope you enjoyed my guide, and before you ask. Yes... I do lift.

Thanks for reading.


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Darkilluzion

Member

02-08-2013

They don't lift, they're just bicep curl warriors. Do they even legs?


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LePWNa

Senior Member

02-08-2013

This actually made me laugh a lot. I bookmarked it. Well done, OP.


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Worst Tolan Ever

Member

02-08-2013

I want to reserve a spot in particularly awesome thread


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IonCannonKarthus

Senior Member

02-08-2013

I lost it at Teemo


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Lead Death

This user has referred a friend to League of Legends, click for more information

Senior Member

02-08-2013

I'm just going to leave this bump here.


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StrengthAndHonor

Senior Member

02-08-2013

Dear god. Bodybuilding memes on a nerdy LoL game? None of you have ever stepped foot in a gym or played a competitive sport.

You are not allowed to use these memes.


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Lead Death

This user has referred a friend to League of Legends, click for more information

Senior Member

02-08-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by StrengthAndHonor View Post
Dear god. Bodybuilding memes on a nerdy LoL game? None of you have ever stepped foot in a gym or played a competitive sport.

You are not allowed to use these memes.

This is funny to me because I actually do lift quite a bit.

You've got me on competitive sports tho, I like to play football when I can.


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SlayerZ

Recruiter

02-08-2013

rengar hunts champs that lift
rengar hunts teemo and khazix
neither of them lifts

??????????????


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MugenNightmare

Senior Member

02-08-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lead Death View Post
Veigar- Too small to lift and too evil to enjoy bagels.
Bagels?


THESE BAGELS ARE FOR LESSER MEN, REAL YORDLES EAT EVIL COOKIES YOU FOOL

WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY SMALL?