From The Eyes of a Rogue Caster Minion--Then Mine

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AngelicRapture

Member

12-11-2012

Anything In Italics (after this sentence) Is the thought of the Caster Minion. Dubbed Castro

Leaving the base, I methodically follow my fellow minions. I know my fate before I leave the base. I am food. I am sustenence. I provide the enemy with gold. Then I die. And Respawn.

Castro: Its really not that bad of a life. I get to constantly fight with no consequences, sure, I get; stabbed, shot, Fireballed, getting hit in the face by bannanas, but the benefits are great. I get full health care and dismemberment insurance.

Castro: At least this isnt DOTA, Id rather die fighting the enemy then get killed by my Hero.I look at the gold counter watch on my wrist. Currently worth 10 gold. Hmm. Not bad.

The siege minion beside me looks at me with a ****-eating grin on his face.

Lucky Son-of-a NoxanAt least he can survive getting hit multiple times by the towers.

Why do we have to take out these towers anywayThere's plenty of jungle space, we can easily walk around them. I tried mentioning this to the Summoners, but they cast a curse on us to prevent us from straying from our paths

As I walk down the middle lane. I see an epic battle unfolding. The enemy team engaged mine. Enraged. I prepared to lob my Orbs at the opposing enemy. I toss, and toss and toss. These enemy Champions are tough, but I will provide whatever assistance I can.

Castro : Combat log: 2 Damage
1 Damage
4 Damage
................

The battle rages for another 10 seconds

Castro : **** **** ****! The warrior minions went down faster than a drunk sorority girl!
***Reminesces about his Minion College days at the Valoran Institute of Minion***

The battle is over. 3 of ours went down versus 4 of thiers.

I had thought the battle was over until an enemy shaco suddenly appeared beside me. He looks severely injured. Barely alive. As he ran to the bushes I followed him. Normally, when someone enters a bush, we a trained to not follow them as soon as they leave the fog of war. But this time, THIS TIME! was different. There was a ward there.

I gathered up all the strength my midget arms could muster. And threw the biggest, most awesome Orb i had ever thrown. The shaco was too busy paying attention to his buymenu screen to notice little me. The orb hit him square on, and down the shaco went.

Castro : Combat Log : 10 damage
Shaco was slain by : Nunu
ACED!

Castro: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT! That was totally my kill!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me : OP MINIONS!

Enemy team : HAHA, @OP minions.