One Who is Whole(An ?OCxRiven? FanFic)

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Frost Archer

Senior Member

12-10-2012

TBH, I barely made it past the first half.

I can tell those are abilities, and I said: I'm just giving my personal opinion on this.

I just hate it when people say: so and so died. It completely removes the meaning of death. That's why I hate stories based on a game itself so much that it BECOMES the game. Hope you understand. ('.' )


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Theamp4

Senior Member

12-11-2012

Chapter 3

Demanding Attention

Riven strode out of her room for the day. There were no matches for her, so she decided to roam around the institute in her search for her own thoughts. The sinister voice still haunted her, but only in the back of her mind. She noticed a few of the champions around the areas she was walking, but they all seemed to grow quiet as she came near, and begin talking as she walked away. She didn’t mind, she was used to it really.

A few of the newer summoners stopped to say hello, but she glared at each one, since they didn’t know who she was, they didn’t realize she was so cold to everyone.

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Auron massaged his forehead. His hangover had not subsided since the time he woke up. Last night had proven to be a bad idea, just like his parents warned him. “Never drink after you’ve been embarrassed, saddened, or extremely happy…”

Stepping out of the shower, he put on a new set of clothes. The dark green shirt had a strange blue stripe cutting through from his right shoulder to his bottom left hip. His blackish pants were close fitting due to the magic he used to form them to his liking. Finally, his trademark jacket was made to cover the top of his face with a hood, along with a way to pull it apart when necessary, or should it be warm outside.

Sighing to himself, he closed the door behind him, walking out to enjoy the scenery, but as he roamed around, eyes closed and aware of only himself with his hands on the back of his head, a body ran into him. “My bad, sorry.” He said instinctively. His eyes open, and he realized he had caused Riven to fall on her face, where she was also holding her left hand. His face twisted in panic, as he realized how angry she probably was, and in his panic, his legs felt like they were going to give out.

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Riven turned the corner, a blank expression on her face. Her mind had drifted to yesterday’s message. “I don’t even know the guy, how could he “save” me. I won’t even need the help anyway…” She continued to say to herself. Her feet fell out from under her. Falling face first, her hands thrust out in front of her to brace her fall.

She cried out in pain. A sharp twang came from her left hand when she became aware of what happened a few seconds earlier. Moving her hand felt impossible, though it could move, and it felt like it was despondent. Swiveling her head back, she began to stand up, holding her left hand with her uninjured hand, and was going to yell at Auron, when she realized what he was doing… Auron was reaching down, and putting his arm around her stomach to pull her with him. “What are you doing?!” She shouted out, confused and frustrated by the Ionian.

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Auron responded, a hint of worry in his voice. “I-I’m going to try and treat your hand, it seems that you have sprained it from how you’re acting…” He opened the door with his free hand, and continued pulling her through the door into his room, and instructed her to sit down while he found his kit.

He found it with relative ease, as he had used it many times before in his life. Tentatively, he inspected her injured hand for swelling, and put a pack of ice on her wrist while he prepared the wrapping to reduce swelling.

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She began to calm down as he nursed her hand. Her face heated up from the treatment she was receiving from him. “…Why…” She whispered to herself. It seemed he heard Riven, but Auron didn’t respond.

Persuading him to be finished, she stood up. “Thanks.” She said curtly, before striding over to the door.

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Auron’s mind was racing with questions for her, but he refrained when he remembered how much she hated being with anyone else. As she walked towards the door though, he called out to her. “Wait!”

She turned her head towards him, her hand on the door. “What, summoner.” She replied back.

Auron shifted uncomfortably. “I’ve seen you around here quite a bit lately, and I’m wondering if you will allow me to summon you now…” An honest question, she had refused to allow most of the summoners from using her, unless she knew they had the most potential for her.

She seemed to contemplate a little before responding back. “No.” Closing the door behind her, Auron cleaned up his kit, dejected.

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Riven stood with her back to the door before beginning her walk again. Her arm still hurt, but she was able to persuade him to let her go. “If it hurts too much, then I’ll just go to the clinic nearby…” She thought to herself. As she came back to her house, another note was there like every other day.

~Riven~

~So how was your…talk with that whelp, hmm? I bet you enjoyed it…I know he didn’t… His reaction was priceless though! Made me laugh quite a bit. Anyway... I have a… special treat for you tomorrow, so be ready for it… or not… I like to see your pain…~

Stacking it on top of the others like always, she stripped down and washed herself in silence, before going to sleep earlier than normal.

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Auron met with Drake at the bar again tonight. “Broooo! I heard you took her in your room for a good bit! Did you make out with her?!” Drake said drunkenly.

Auron shook his head in disgust. “Why am I not surprised… No I didn’t. She’s too cold to me anyway…” He said, going quieter as he spoke. Ordering a drink, he chugged it down quickly. “Plus, I doubt she cares for others like friends for that matter.”

Drake pushed Auron on the arm, almost knocking him off the stool. “You’re too soft man!” He finished ANOTHER mug. A pile of them were stacking up nearby. “You should just talk to her! **** your shyness! You won’t get anywhere by running away from it!” He ordered another drink, and drank at it as well.

Auron thought deeply and didn’t respond. He got another 4 drinks, intending to get drunk tonight as well.

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Stumbling back to his room, he laughed to himself for no reason. Opening the door seemed impossible in his drunken state, so he tried to magically open it. Successfully, he opened the door, and did the same thing to lock it and slipped into bed quietly… He thought he felt something when he sprawled out for sleeping, but he paid it no mind as he fell asleep…

Author's Note:

3rd chapter! I was able to input some really good material for this one! I set a little teaser for the next chapter as well, hope you realize what it is! Overall I think this was a good chapter. As always, like every other chapter, please give feedback, it is much appreciated!


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kittytoast

Senior Member

12-11-2012

But who is threatening Riven!?

WHO?!

Bahahaha I bet he magically just broke into someone else's room. I hope it's Taric's ;P Jk jk.

Quote:
A sharp ***** came from her left hand when she became aware of what happened a few seconds earlier.
What was in the asterisks? I can't figure it out for the life of me.


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Theamp4

Senior Member

12-11-2012

It was Pr*ck

Now it is Twang

And you will see what that was about next chapter ;3


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kittytoast

Senior Member

12-11-2012

oooho that makes sense as to why it was censored needlessly XD


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Theamp4

Senior Member

12-13-2012

I hath bumped thine to the forefront of the first page!


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Frost Archer

Senior Member

12-13-2012

Omg. Every time I read your title I keep on seeing "who is in a hole" XD I mean I know WHAT it really says, just that I can't process it that way. XD


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Frost Archer

Senior Member

12-13-2012

Suggestion> you tend to put a lot of these
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Unless the setting changes, I don't think you need to put in the lines. If a change of events/topic occurs, but still revolves around the same subject, a new paragraph is enough.

(I'm looking for a word to replace topic.... I'll have it for you in a while)


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Frost Archer

Senior Member

12-13-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Theamp4 View Post
I tried to make it as realistic as possible, without naming any specific moves, such as her dying even after Darius died with nothing to provoke her. (bleeding effect) I added the "respawn" part because it IS a league match, and dying permanently would be... problematic at best. Plus, I wanted Darius to die anyway, for added effects, which tie in to later in the chapter.

Unless it is part of a LEAGUE match, there will be nothing related to their ability names and respawn.

If you didn't notice, the bright flash of light both times were her ability: Ki Burst. I always thought it just blinded them for the duration in a sense where they couldn't act do to it, though I could be wrong. When she jumps up in the air to finish him, that's Broken Wings 3rd attack. I'm actually thinking about taking out the growing sword, for something later, but I have an idea that I could do either way, so I don't think there is too big a difference...

I hope I didn't make too many references though D:

Thanks for the feedback though, I really appreciate it and will take it into consideration!

Edit: 3rd chapter will be released tomorrow when I write it up :P
NO! References are GOOD. Just not to the game/gameplay/gamemode... ('.' ) Pretty much every champion/item/etc. have a reference to something other than that of riot games.


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Theamp4

Senior Member

12-14-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by FrostArcher024 View Post
Omg. Every time I read your title I keep on seeing "who is in a hole" XD I mean I know WHAT it really says, just that I can't process it that way. XD
LOL.

Quote:
Originally Posted by FrostArcher024 View Post
Suggestion> you tend to put a lot of these
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Unless the setting changes, I don't think you need to put in the lines. If a change of events/topic occurs, but still revolves around the same subject, a new paragraph is enough.

(I'm looking for a word to replace topic.... I'll have it for you in a while)
Well, I do this because it is a shift in perspective. Auron doesn't notice everything, same as Riven, yet they notice different things. Hence the perspective change. I just denote it by using the hyphens. Tilde's are time lapse's

Quote:
Originally Posted by FrostArcher024 View Post
NO! References are GOOD. Just not to the game/gameplay/gamemode... ('.' ) Pretty much every champion/item/etc. have a reference to something other than that of riot games
I was talking about the game references though :c In my defense, I didn't see any other way to implement that type of fight.