[Champion Concept] Gabriel, the Scrap Animator

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Bliztron

Senior Member

10-22-2012

Thats cool. I need your assistance on a court trial

http://na.leagueoflegends.com/board/....php?t=2711310


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Shrouded Snake

Senior Member

11-03-2012

Changed the Lore a bit, scraped useless info and added a few more tweeks. Unless there is something really OP, my baby is all grown up now.

Now I know how you felt Bliztron.

Suggestions and constructive criticism are welcome.


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Shrouded Snake

Senior Member

11-03-2012

WOOPS! Forgot to add the quotes. Now it's done.


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Shrouded Snake

Senior Member

12-10-2012

Apparently. I'm not as done as I thought. Tweaked the Lore a bit and updated the stats to reflect the current ones better.


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Bliztron

Senior Member

12-18-2012

Bump!


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Shrouded Snake

Senior Member

12-19-2012

Completely reworked W. Hopefully it's not too OP.


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Bliztron

Senior Member

12-28-2012

bump for my buddy


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Icraig33

Senior Member

12-28-2012

Aight, here is my review of your champion, take what you wish of it! Also, Bliztron has been been very excited for me to review this champ of yours, so i'm expecting something at least somewhat awesome!

Innate:
- I personally like it. I remember a leaked thread about the Heimer rework, and he had this kind of innate (it was the exact same in concept, but with different numbers).I would be wary about the amount of CDR you can get when getting junk from a champ, but otherwise, really cool!

Q:
- This is another really cool, well-balanced ability. I'm liking what I see so far! My only complaint would be to reduce the AoE to something like 250-275, as 325 might be just a tad too much, especially if you pull off a stun with it.

W:
- I'm a little confused on the targeting. Is it a reticle like Anivia's wall/Malzahar's CotV/Jayce's gate, or is it vector-targeted like Rumble's ult and Viktor's laser? Also, is the current distance between the two walls you have written in the post the starting distance or the ending distance? I ask because it sounds like a really neat idea, but the wording is a little off.

E:
- I would personally lower the bonus per minion/champion hit slightly and have it scale up to a slighly higher amount at later ranks. As it is right now, it has the potential to do too much damage early on and to little later. Aside from that, it seems reasonable.

R:
- The damage scaling on this seems like it has the potential to be too much when considering the fact that it lingers on after the tornado (at least, the way you have it worded makes me assume that the DoT lingers even after the tornado is over). Instead of having the damage as 400 +95% over 2.5s, I would the the damage as 200 +25% per second for 2s. That way it will be not only a little more reasonable in terms of damage potential, it'll also be easier to track the total damage you can do with this. Of course, you can go ahead and disregard this if I'm not understanding the ability correctly.

So, overall, I really like what you did with this guy. He seems pretty fun and most of his abilities look balanced right off the bat and I am very glad he lived up to the hype that Bliztron was giving me over him. Good job!


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Shrouded Snake

Senior Member

12-29-2012

Bump.


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BergMeister

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Senior Member

01-02-2013

-BergMeister's Review-
I have finally returned from feeling ill to where I can actually think instead of feel like ****. Here is my promised review. I do greatly feel as though you did a great job on this champion, so if I come across harsh understand I'm here only to help you fix minor problems I see in the way you word things and express yourself, as well as a few balancing issues and completion issues that I've found. The way I will break up my review is based upon the categories that make up a champion, while there are more than lore and abilities, those are the two that need reviews. Typically a review on quotes isn't necessary. Anyway, read up, take my words for what their worth, if you don't agree that's fine, I can only give a review to the best of my opinions and knowledge.

LoreNotes:
"...he keeps his talent a secret out of fear that it would..." Missed word
Overall decent, but this is not my area of expertise so I would like to refrain from speaking where I do not have knowledge. However, I wish you'd give less background information on him (condense all you have into one paragraph) and give more on the actual fight between twitch and Gabe. This will allow you to talk about your abilities more and will keep your readers on the edge of their seat.

Abilities/Ability Synergy:
You never expressed how to activate the bonus's.

Lore Synergy: Again, condensing the backstory and bringing out more of the action will allow you to talk more of your kit in the lore, but I see the bunnies and the teeth so far.

Core Synergy: I feel like the synergy here is a little weak. You have damage, wall, damage. What happens when the wall closes in on you? Does it stun you? or Do damage? Or just create a narrow place to walk through. If so that might synergize with his E. Lastly how does his tornado work exactly? do you control it like Viktors ult? or is a straight line ability.

Passive-Core Synergy: His passive definately contains synergy with the rest of his kit. Most of his kit leaves scrap behind giving him the ability to utilize his passive.

Side Notes: Careful I believe his passive might be being used for the heimerdinger rework. don't worry about it yet, but you might need to change that if the rumor is true. I like the abilities you created, you just need to figure out how to make them synergize together more that makes sense to why they are cast the way they are and why they are part of his kit more so than the fact that he is an inventor. I believe you are on to something really good here, the wall is an amazing concept if you can simply iron out the explanation of what exactly it does.

I shall not mark this as completed yet, I will stay to observe how you feel about my critique and when you feel as though you can no longer benefit from me then I will mark my review as complete.