Nunu and the ham sandwich of life and death

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dwarfortres

Senior Member

08-18-2010

Inspired by the awesome chain story found here,
http://www.bay12forums.com/smf/index.php?topic=19277.15
I decided to start my own story, except with a few twists to make it more LoL friendly. I will start the story out, and anyone may continue the story as long as they follow the rules laid out here.

You MUST leave your post open ended, so that someone else can continue it.

Your post must be under 100 words.

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Nunu starts out this story with no gold and an empty inventory, other than one item. "The Ham Sandwich of Life of Death". Its abilities remain mostly unknown, but there are several rules which govern its use/existance.

1) The sandwich may never directly harm or lead to the direct harm/death of its possessor. The exception of this rule is laid out in rule number 5.
2) The sandwich will never be made of anything but ham. To suggest otherwise, as in "Hey, is that a Tuna sandwich!?" will result in immediate death.
3) Rule 2 is superceeded by rule number 1.
4) Any creature or animal or champion who intends to harm the bearer of the sandwich will be immediately overcome with a complete and unwavering desire to POSSESS the sandwich, and will attempt to do so by any means necessary (without damaging the sandwich of course).
5) The sandwich prefers to stay with its current owner (It trusts who it knows) but in order to prevent itself from being eaten, whenever the current owner attempts to eat the sandwich, they will immediately encounter a situation which requires them to divert their attention away from the sandwich. These situations must NOT be instantly fatal. The bearer must always have a chance to make it out of the situation alive (if it is dangerous), no matter how remote.

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Nunu smiles, as it is a beautiful and cold day outside. He looks down, at his delicious Ham Sandwich. He goes to consume a bite out of the sandwich when............


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SuicidalPankake

Senior Member

08-19-2010

...Nunu trips and hits his head rather hard. Shaco calmly walks over and picks up the sandwich, grinning smugly at how well his tripwire worked. Nunu, having hit his head, now has very, very blurred vision. He wonders aloud, "Who is that, and why are they holding a tuna sandwhich?" and promptly dies.

Shaco decides to devour the sandwhich in one bite, when suddenly....


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DannehBoy

Senior Member

08-20-2010

...Akali teleports in, stabs him in the throat, and the sandwich falls out, drenched in blood. She laughs, and decides to leave it there. The fail Shaco thought it was a good idea to bring revive with him to Summoner's Rift, but he must now rush there to retrieve the sandwich. Twisted Fate decided he would avenge Shaco, and keep any of Shaco's belongings for his friends. He instantly gated there, but he was facing Heimerdinger, with his three turrets surronding Twisted Fate...


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Fapjuice

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Recruiter

08-21-2010

...Twisted Fate than says to Heimerdinger "Look! A distraction!" Heimerdinger and his turrets look in the direction, when suddenly Pantheon Grand Skyfalls onto Heimerdinger killing him and his turrets as well as thrusting the sandwich upwards in the air (unharmed of course). However, Pantheon also killed Twisted Fate due to the setting friendly fire being on, Twisted Fate than rage quits! SUDDENLY...


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Zanoma

Senior Member

08-21-2010

I lost interest when the first unclassy murder was announced.


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heyguyshowudoin

Member

08-22-2010

said Twisted Fate before rage quitting while the sandwich was flying in mid air Amumu jumped into the sky grasping the ham sandwich breaking it in half and then immediately turning towards Pantheon and asking if he would like to be friends forever. Pantheon replied no I have no use for mummies and was a fool as at that moment Amumu began to cry spilling magic damage everywhere and killing Pantheon in the process. Amumu ventured on but was unaware at who was lurking in the bushes nearby.


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LunarisDream

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Senior Member

08-22-2010

What Amumu did not know was that although he paid no attention to the sandwich, it DID pay attention to him and snagged on one of the many trailing bandages. As Amumu walked along in the jungle, he was shocked to find himself stunned as Warwick popped out of the bush and slashed at him with Madred's Bloodrazors. Amumu tried to run, but stumbled over the ham sandwich of life and death, causing him to fall and... well... die. As Warwick laughs at another clean kill, he looks down and notices the bloodstained sandwich. It was so beautiful, so alluring... he must have it!


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CrossbowFFS

Member

08-22-2010

Picking it up, he immediately feels a sharp pain in his back. Turning around, he sees Akali, holding her 1337 blades (now bloodstained). Over his head was "OVER 9000!" and his vision went blurry and then gray.
[/story]
lol did i ruin the story nobodys posting after me...


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Tumblr Feminist

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Senior Member

08-22-2010

Akali Promtly starts to eat the sandvich when Gragas flies out of no where and drinks his hops of doom and eats her face Also consuming the sandvich But the sandvich has not been consumed yet


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CrossbowFFS

Member

08-23-2010

^WTF? He consumes it and then he doesn't... that's... stupid...


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