Udyr vs Warwick Comic

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Jimmy Noir

Senior Member

02-07-2012

I decided I wanted to make a comic based around a battle between Udyr and Warwick. Random idea I know, but I always thought of them as THE jungle rivals. There's actually some plot and I'm mainly doing this for my love of LoL and as some practice, (I plan on majoring in sequential art).

Update (02/08/12)
So I spiffed the page up a bit. Added trees speeding on by in the first panel, and some speed effects in the third along with minor things like the small motion line for the nose and ears. Once again, the background and affects don't look to hot but this project is mostly for fun, and isn't to serious of a project. Still need to add text and other minor adjustments.

... Still need to add that tail ~_~


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Grand Viper

Senior Member

02-07-2012

Despite the amount of fanfic on these forums, I always felt like it could have more comics. Don't worry about it man, the only way one can get better is if you let others see your stuff! Constructive criticism should be welcomed if anyone has any to say.

With that said, I like what I'm seeing so far! Good rough sketch, a few minor problems but you got the action going which I find the hardest to detail. I would like to see more (Especially that of Udyr. I always have fun with how he fights, the beast man of Ionia)

I'll be waiting for the rest man, you got my support!


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Jimmy Noir

Senior Member

02-07-2012

If you don't mind me asking what are these minor problems? I ask because I would like to know where I can improve :3


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Grand Viper

Senior Member

02-07-2012

Well, I'm going to divide the comic up into 3 large panels and the 2 smaller panels. And this is going to be long because I want to try and explain myself as thoroughly as I could.

The first panel and the two smaller ones are my favorite aesthetically. I have to state that I do like how you iterated the action in these scenes and I know exactly what Warwick is doing despite no words being present. A very good feat, that means your reader knows what is going on just through body language.

Critique time!

In the 2nd large panel, Warwick's neck seems too long and narrow for the body type he has. His right arm is longer than his left in the same panel and his legs feel slightly off. This is a common problem when you draw someone crouching, especially if you draw an animal crouching with non-human legs. Your left arm is what I would imagine to be the correct length This panel has the most trouble because it is so small, I find it a common issue when you draw things small but then you try and make things look more visible and you become all fiddle faddle foo'd when drawing it.

The 3rd large panel is strictly due to my own preference. Aesthetically speaking, it is fine. Read on if you want to see what my personal idea would be =p

It seems very human, and I think you should exaggerate it. Warwick's personality has to shine through, I'd imagine him seeming maniacal at the given thought of his prey nearby. He seems happy, but I'd push it further to bring the point home. I'd give him furrowed brow with that same kind of joyful eyes he currently has. What would hit it home would be his mouth, that is what makes me think of him most humane. He looks happy from a human perspective. I would take a look at a how a dog is when he's snarling, when a dog is happy they pant and have about a quarter inch of their teeth showing and tongue panting. When they're angry, snarling, wary, anything, their lips and cheeks draw back to show all of their pearly whites. Warwick is malicious, I would give him a full snarl, showing gums and everything. Because his eyes would look happy, the furrowed brow would make him seem determined and then the baring of every tooth and the gumline would make him seem like he's over ecstatic about his find. If you had furrowed brows but piercing eyes with the full exposure of the jaw he would seem like he's angry. If he's got happy eyes, no furrowed brow, the exposure of the jaw he seems like he's genuinely pleased to see someone and wants to hang out with them. By keeping the same smile he currently has but furrowed brows and an angry look in his eyes would make him seem really upset that he sensed someone but is attempting to control it.

Facial expressions tend to be hard, but with non human characters I think over-exaggerations would work quite well!

Phew! That's a lot to type. By the by Jimmy, not to shamelessly plug my own stuff in, but I did update another story in my short story center. I'd think you'd enjoy it. (It's a manly story)

By the by, if you ever think I'm too harsh in how I phrase anything, anything at all, please tell me. I really am not trying to be a **** but I can be a bit...blunt sometimes without meaning to be. Just let me know if ever a case occurs.


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SpicyJackTheBard

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Recruiter

02-07-2012

I would really like to see more of this. It looks pretty good!


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Jimmy Noir

Senior Member

02-07-2012

No it's fine, everything you said was true. I'll mess around with the 2nd big panel a bit and fix the arm. The 3rd panel... god ur right on there too XD
Now that I look at him he makes me think of the grinch!


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Jimmy Noir

Senior Member

02-07-2012

Bump for updated page!


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Grand Viper

Senior Member

02-07-2012

I was about to go to sleep when I saw you updated your page. I like the updates! Keep up the good work man (and I completely didn't notice the tail until you pointed it out =p)


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Jimmy Noir

Senior Member

02-08-2012

update bump... man I hope more people start fallowing this


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Jaykoboy

Senior Member

02-08-2012

I like the updates to page one! Very clean-cut now.


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