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[POWER]Smack Psycho-Gaming

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Cr1m1n4L

Junior Member

07-07-2010

-1- Power breeds success. Use it but don't abuse it.



YOU LOVE POWER. you know you do. greedisgood? i bet you know that one. power overwhelming? that one too. you know all catchy phrases from games where you screamed harder than girl with pms when you got too much gold than you can spend. starcraft, warcraft, age of empires... many more. gold = power. power = success.


Don't abuse power. You know what power is? Warwick getting 6th level and charging at your 3 level Master Shmoe wielding a BF SWORD. he will mince you into salamy with only Endless Duress, at lower damage. you know what power creates? FEAR. no, not feedlestix, shaco box fear. ACTUAL TERROR. before you know it, your mind printed a word "HAX". "****in no life plays all day" you know whats that? YOU GIVE UP WIMP. your not a trooper. but you can't help to tremble at power. if you don't have power, someone else does. in a game, that someone is a good-mind settling warwick who buys BF SWORD at 6th level.


don't comeback at me with "its a game, get a life" I have a life, and so do you. but you don't be clicking that right-click when you see a gank with your name on it faster than a kid hopping in candy store because you have a life? YOUR AFRAID that your champion will be ganged up like on euro porn. the enemy team will orgy out on you if you don't run. and its wise, don't give them the gold. jungle, get gold, kill 3 champions, create power.


Power is must have. You gotta have it, keep it and nurture it. You gotta get more gold, be greedy and get more swords. and boots, so they will fear the warwick with 5 swords in two arms, a jaw full of pointy teeth and a 5 boots. not literary speaking, but you know what i mean.



-2- Knowledge is power. ABUSE IT




Play every champion atleast twice. Take it for a test ride. they drive smoothly through hordes of neutral creeps waiting for their fate? good, remember that hero. he thirsts blood, and thrusts power. you like a certain hero but he lacks something? try things out. more armor, more health, lifesteal, damage... TRY IT OUT, in practice not in match making. I'll spite anger at you for trying a champion in matchmaking and taking my jungle to farm gold for the enemy team. i don't want them getting the swords, I do. be smart, play safe, play many champions and find your aces.


When you look at runes and masteries are you thinking whats best to pick? ooh, this gives me magic resist and more damage. ill take it. NO you dumb blonde. what will help you get power. what will make jungle easy mode? more armor? more damage? get that. think... terrorists don't hold a gun to your head when you pick.


Who strives mostly at level 1 in jungle? lifesteal ****ers. they hit, get their face full of neutral punches but SURVIVE. they gulp it up and move on to the next bunch. they got the power and the abilities to reap success. those are your picks. not the squishy ryze who nukes out teams. he won't blend with jungle level 1. he won't survive without going back to base until level 6th. he won't live to cause fear if he jungles for gold and power. others will. get warwick, throw him in the neutral pit with some potions and a silly cloth armor. he will come out a trooper with 2000 gold. guess where you will spend it? A BIG ****ING SWORD!


Try all of them. Hell joke around taking ryze in too, if you can live past level 2 without teleporting to base. But try it and learn what champions are made of steel. equip them like a god and enjoy causing fear and terror.


-3- Power needs control, be tactical



Hell yeah, bloodlust and greed is good. Rage is better, when you point it at the stupid **** who killed you with his team mates all piled on you with 3 ignites and a freaking exhaust. If they spend more than 5 seconds in killing you, they fail. no power in them, they can't take on a criminal greedy raging jungler like yourself so they need to gank you. THEY FEAR YOU. you have power and they don't be messing with you alone.


You know this. but don't be a mofo to run directly into them again all cocky without any plan or strategy. your not dumb as a goblin. if you are, hang around with your squishy power ranger team and hide in bushes. tell your team to pick ignite and exhaust, so you can kill ONE target.


Coordinate your team. Enemies are in turmoil because you killed 5 of them before they all barely killed you. have your disable/nukes/tanks ready. tell them the big bad scumbag needs help taking down the willy jolly panty riders. tell them to eat some damage so you can make steak out of their "so-called" carry. he probably tries to jungle his first BF Sword while you grind your IE off the golem's head.


But don't worry with you not having disables. not having slow, stun, knockback, heal and all sorta ****. you have POWER. and you cause FEAR just by being there. take that and boss around your good player called TEAM MATES with good instructions. they know your a mother****er who proved how bad, wicked sadistic greedy raging and WISE you are, so they will follow. Everyone likes a powerful leader. BE ONE! i'm not taunting you, just giving you motivational waves of information. read this twice, get the guts and the good team mates... ruin other people's day. out of spite, because you can.


You don't stack IE all over the game. you know this, you need more. you need to survive to chew their carry, their tank and jog after their healer with a smile "Hey im just letting you run, you know this" attitude. Buy a Banshees Veil. That will shut up ryze's "OOH I GOT ME RUNE PRISON" you know what... come here, ull say. Eat it up, grind smash chew bash... DEAD RYZE. like he should be. Buy more armors if they are all greedy mother****ers buying swords like on a ***** sale. they have power too. counter it. you got the IE, now buy that Thornmail. After your Bloodthirster and Sword of the Occult of course.


But the earth doesn't spin around you, no matter how ****ing awesome your killing spree is. You don't win by killing them praying little midgets. you kill their nexus. YEA that big crystal thingie in their base. You smash it so hard the death animation will be felt in Riot Games Office. you bust it open along with your evil team mates.


TEAM PLAY. NEXUS MUST DIE OR NO WIN.


-4- Summary


POWER/FEAR/GREED/RAGE/KNOWLEDGE/TACTIC IS ALL GOOD. Get it and keep it up. Jungle until 6th, get your BF SWORD and eat some squishies. Then slash some more. when they fear you enough, get out of your shoes and take your team for a victory lane down their nexus. don't stop at anything.


DONT FEED THEM. FAIL THIS AND COME BACK READ THIS GUIDE WHILE YOU SMASH YOUR KEYBOARD WITH YOUR HEAD. TWICE


COORDINATE. THIS IS A TEAM BATTLE. YOUR THE ****ER OF THE ****ERS BUT YOU NEED TO LEAD YOUR TEAM MATES IN ORDER TO WIN. YOU CAN'T AND NEVER WILL WIN ALONE. TANK/NUKE/DISABLE/HEALER ALL WELCOMED ON YOUR SIDE.


I don't thank you because I got game to play and this wasted my time. Tell me if you have something good for adding, I will look at it...


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CTHDRL

Senior Member

07-07-2010

Poorly written.

Tried too hard TBH.


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Matuk

Senior Member

07-07-2010

...lolwut?

I agree with Oneironaut. =.=


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Be Calm Carry On

Senior Member

07-08-2010

Brought you you by Cocaine (tm).


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Nihili

Senior Member

07-08-2010

Wut?

Since when do we need guides to common sense?


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Tiskari

Junior Member

07-08-2010

Although i don't rightly know what you just said... i feel strangly touched.

Your rather unorthadox writing style seems poetic to me.


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Burning Dude

Senior Member

07-08-2010

Just log on to +1.
really like the passion.


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Cr1m1n4L

Junior Member

07-12-2010

Its not intended to win an Oscar. Its psychology rant


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Jansen

Member

07-12-2010

Despite what other's said, I think it's a good post.

Attitude and philosophy about the game are important.


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