January MCCC - There Will Come Soft Rains

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Moby the White

Senior Member

01-30-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by DryRun View Post
Stil, the Desert Shaman


Overview:
Gender - Male
Race - Human
Origin - Shiruma Desert
Alliance - Uknown (seemingly good)
Class: Fighter
Subclass: Tank/Jungle
Weapon: Crystal dagger
Attack Type: Melee
Energy Source: Energy

Description
Stil is a jungle capable top lane champion who is well equipped for the grueling battle of attrition that is well known in both roles. He combines a ranged harass with a strong shield to stand up in skirmishes. His third ability can be used as a way in or a way out, giving him either a strong escape or a solid gank assistance. He scales well with HP and AD items. Note that Stils abilities give him lots of in game presence, he is tailored to have an ability for most situations, a damaging ranged harass, a shield and a gap closer/escape tool. Depending on the game leveling up the correct ability gives him flexibility on the team that is further complimented by his ultimate. His final ability allows him to cast any other ability but with much greater effect.

Quick Ability Overview

Passive - Extra attack damage for each nearby enemy.

Q - Ranged single target damage with light slow, can be fired multiple times with decreasing effect.

W -Shield that if not destroyed casts an Aoe defuff when its duration is up.

E - Passive damage reduction, Activate for a movement and attack buff.

R - Empowers next ability with additional effects.


Abilities

Passive - Crystal Knife - Stils weapon is an imbued crystal knife. It grows stronger as needed by increasing his attack damage by 5/7.5/10 (at level 1/7/13) for every enemy champion nearby or 3/5/7 (at 1/7/13) for each nearby neutral monster (200 range). The knife glows an ever brighter blue as this buff takes effect. Note, once a stack is established by enemy or monster a stack of Crystal Knife persists for five seconds (example monster dies or enemy leaves range).

seems legit has all the info I need and seems balanced. 5/5

This has a number of uses on Stil. It makes him stronger depending on the size of the teamfight, it allows him to jungle effectively, and because of the glowing effect he can check brush for nearby enemies without walking into them (just not so well in the jungle!).

Q - Clockwork Pistol - Stil fires a magic dart out of his spring loaded pistol applying a Thumper debuff revealing the target and slowing them by 20% for 3 seconds. The targeted enemy also takes 15/40/65/90/115 (+0.8 ad) as magic damage. The clockwork pistol can be fired up to two more times during its regular cooldown, with each consecutive shot dealing 33% less damage and at 33% less range, each additional hit applies or refreshes the Thumper debuff for an additional 1.5 seconds. Firing the pistol this way adds 4 seconds to its cooldown. Stils attacks against an enemy effected by Thumper refund him 25 energy per hit.
Costs - 75 (then 25 for each additional shot)
Cooldown - 8 seconds (up to 16 seconds.)
Range - 600 (then 400, then 200)
This is Stils ranged harass in lane. It is also the beginning of his combo (see below with thumper). If used at the right time, it will allow you to get off all three spells much faster by refunding enough energy for his third ability in a combo. If played correctly Stil can slow you then use his speed burst to catch up enough to land his second (and thus shorter ranged [/I]Clockwork Pistol after that auto attacking to make up for the huge energy cost.

Okay so this spell has a lot of viability and was actually balanced quite well I would love to see something like this ingame. 5/5 good job
As for how this spell would work; You fire it normally and the icon begins its normal cooldown blueish cycle but with the number 2 superimposed over it. If you choose to fire it again that number becomes a one, and the cooldown grows by four seconds, after firing for the third and final time, its a normal spell on cooldown (with another additional 4 seconds).

W - Hardsuit - The harsh reality of Stils native environment has made his people strong. His armour doubles as a survival suit and when needed can supply a rejuvenating boost. Stil activates his amour gaining a shield that absorbs 70/140/210/280/350 (+0.8ap) for 3 seconds. If the shield dissipates without being broken, the quick ionization of the surrounding atmosphere lowers nearby enemies attack speed by 70% that slowly decays over 3/3.5/4/4.5/5 seconds.
Costs - 100
Cooldown - 20/18/16/14/12 seconds
Range - Self
Range (AS debuff) - 300This ability allows Stil to trade damage in lane or in the jungle. One point is very effective in the jungle. By late game this shield allows him to soak up even powerful bursts on his way into battle. It also works as an indirect taunt, making enemies want to attack your shield, this can be powerful in a team fight pulling damage towards your shield and away from your teams primary dps champions.

Well the costs and cooldowns of this are fare too low for an ability like this up the cooldown a lot and give it a scaling cost. 4/5

E - Sand Walker - Shurima nomads are hardy, agile fighters used to braving the myriad of dangers south of the barrier.
Passive: Each level of Sand Walker blocks 1/2/3/4/5 physical damage per stack of Crystal Knife from each attack on Stil.
Active: Stil attacks with renewed vigor. For the next 3 seconds he gains 25% movement speed, 25% attack speed, and, 25% tenacity. Additionally, his first auto attack after activating this ability knocks the target back.
Cost - 50
Cooldown - 12/11/10/9/8
Range - Self
Range (knockback) - 250
A stat buff, the move speed and cc reduction help him get into the fight where he needs to be, the attack speed makes you more a threat once you get there. The knock back makes you scary coming in for their carry. Correctly used - between your speed boost your rapid fire slows, and your cc reduction you should get into position to get their carry...out...of....position. The passive is another jungle superiority to make up for his lack of early Aoe or low cooldown high damage spells. It also has great lane potential, effectively mitigating a portion of minion damage during exchanges. As it scales it remains a helpful tanking tool.

this is a good ability and in fact the damage reduction is actually on the lower side. I think that you need to up this as well as the cooldown by a little bit. 4/5 minor tweaking.

R - Sand Wyrm - In moments of need Stil can summon one of the great sand Wyrms from the depths of the desert. On cast a swirling aura of broken ground surrounds Stil for 6 seconds revealing that the Wyrm has arrived. All of stills abilities have their cooldowns refreshed by 3/4/5 seconds. Any spell cast during the duration of Sand Wyrm is empowered:
Costs - 0
Cool down - 60/45/30 seconds
Range - Self

Pretty epic sounding but it does what.... oh wait theres more excited again!

Clockwork Pistol - Increases damage by 10/20/30% as well as doubling the slow and amount of energy refunded by auto attacking a the target.
Once a target is affected by Thumper Stils summoned wyrm rushes towards them leaving a trail of broken ground then erupting from the earth knocking up enemies for 0.5 seconds and dealing 200/300/400 physical damage (+1.5 ad).
Up to 30% more damage. The energy return is much more potent in later levels because of the global cooldown reduction of the ult allows him to cast much faster in the heat of a battle as long as he has the energy. Launching the Wyrm is a great initiation move, players should try to time it to hit as many enemies as possible.

Hardsuit - Increases the shield amount by 30/40/50%. Stils summoned Wyrm attunes itself to his shield, and when it breaks or reaches the end of the duration the Wrym attempts to swallow him, disintegrating into sand at the last moment. All enemies within the Aoe around Stil are knocked towards him taking 200/300/400 physical damage (+1.5 ad). Also, Stil is healed for 5% of his maximum health (+5% for each enemy caught in the effect).
I chose a shield instead of a heal because healing from energy would be nightmarishly close to unlimited self sustain. This is an alternative initiation, better in the tank role, but less damaging and harder to hit. This is a fairly large shield with a moderate cooldown, it is a spell that requires perfect timing to maximize because to get the most out of it you want the enemy to just be able to pop it without doing any less damage or much more.

Sand Walker - As long as Stil is standing on the Wyrms broken ground, the movement speed buff from Sand Walker is increased to 50%. Additionally, as long as Stil is standing on the broken ground, the effects of Sand Walker will continually refresh. Casting Sand Walker will not prevent the empowered version of either Clockwork Pistol, or Hardsuit.
Choosing a different spell to augment gives Stil flexibility, bigger shield for tanking, more damage and slow, plus energy return for dps, or AoE damage and a much longer MS buff from the Wyrm

okay I definitely like this ability and the many different attributes of it. 5/5 the movie dune had better be in my chocolatey drink somewhere below...

Stats

Health - 428 (+85)
Hp 5 - 6.25 (+0.7)
Energy - 200
Energy Regen. - 50
Range - 125
Attack Damage - 52.8 (+3.2)
Attack Speed - 0.647 (+3.1%)
Armour - 16 (+3.7)
Magic Res. - 30 (+1.25)
Mov. Speed - 340

5/5
Thanks for taking a look, this is my first contest entry and i found it very fun. 1 point to the person who can guess the inspiration for this champion lol. Lore is here, hopefully a regional apocalypse is enough, i found it much easier to merge with lol canon with the league of legends still existing.

Appearance -
Height - Rather tall, 6' 6" or so
Physical Build - Strong but thin almost looks dried out...been in the desert awhile he as.
Hair style and color - Long and unkemp (bearded), very unimportant right now for him.
Eye color - Blue on blue of course
Weapons - Crystal knife grows brighter blue the more enemies around him.
Attire - faded and worn brown/sandy/reddish leathery armour with greyish\sandy cape.

Lore

Prophets and doomsayers have long heralded the end of the world. Ask any nomad who ekes his existence from the Shurima Desert, however, and they will tell you the world ended eons ago. Very little is known about the current inhabitants of this once great empire. That is no great surprise as successful crossings of the great barrier are as infrequent as their attempts. There remains though, a particular magic in that scarred land. The people live unnaturally long lives, there are even rumors that some of the greatest tribe leaders have been alive since the runewars first scourged their ancient kingdoms. Every aspect of tribe life is focused on conservation. From their spring fired pistols and their water conserving hardsuits, nothing in the desert is wasted. Even their sacred crystal daggers are bonded to each warriors life force, never breaking or growing dull. One undeniable fact of the desert is that hard lives forge a hard people, and despite their limited numbers and resources Shurimian tribesmen are considered superb warriors. As could be expected due to the ruin brought upon them by magic, the people of Shurima are suspicious of mages and most obvious uses of magic are preformed in secret and ascribed as natural phenomenon or religious rites. Regardless, most tribe leaders have some grasp of magic.

Stil had been chieftain of the largest Shurimian tribe for as long as living memory. Any living memory that is, except his. Born a prince to the greatest kingdom south of the barrier, Icathia, Stil survived is destruction and all the following cataclysms brought by the rune wars. He has lead the remnants of his people for untold generations, the harsh reality of survival consuming his every moment. One day, however, he sensed a changing in the air, something he had not felt for ages. Something dark that he had thought the world long since ridden of. After conferring with the great prophet of this age, Malzahar, Stil took on a grim demeanor. He made arrangements with his tribe and crossed the barrier. He comes with a message, a dire warning of things to come. He will not let the rest of Runeterra suffer like his lost Icathia. Once across Stil found the soft wet landers did not heed his warnings as seriously as he hoped. After some time wandering and learning about the northern lands the solution became clear, make his way to the League of Legends, win his way into a position of power and acclaim then do what is necessary to prepare.

"The land did melt, the sea did swell, the sky did fall...and again they are coming..."
- Stil, the Desert Shaman

Your introduction describing shurimans was well done, but remember like I said you want the majority of your lore to be about your champion. So even if we don't know a lot about the champion's information like his name or what not we can still hear about him. You should try to minimize further introductions of this manner to a few sentences otherwise it becomes overly lengthy. Remember this is a short read. You want to introduce your character, his backstory, where he is from, what brought him to that point, and then you want to close out. Keep it short, sweet, and simple. But at the same time make your readers fall in love with it. But don't touch this intro because it was good. I liked it. Your second half nicely executed the involvement of Malzahar. I was curious as to how you were going to do that and if you would pull it off. The problem you faced here was that your most critical moments were not highlighted with detail. The crossing of the desert was originally detailed as treacherous yet you skipped this journey most likely because you realized you had already written a novella and decided to cut that part short. Look, you already are writing a long lore you might as well add some flavor to it. I want the juicy details of his travels. I think his background info for history and memory of how long he has been there or whatever was a slight cop-out. You really don't let your reader into your character. I think we should have seen his desperation later in the story when he approached the wetlanders. But that was also shortlived. Imagine for me a triangle. This is your plot arc. At the very peak is the climax/crisis point if you create a scene where you just skip the details of your main turning point, you create a rounded triangle. Don't become a rounded triangle. 3/5

Speech

Champion Selected
"Heed my Words."

Movement
"Naturally."
"Yes."
"Do you think that wise?"
"For you summoner."
"Walk without a rhythm."

Attacking
"I'll finish them."
"Icathia!"

Casting Ult
-Incoherent mumbling until next spell is cast.-

Taunt
"The Shurimian wastes would make short work of you!"
-Inspects his dagger, flourishes it then sheaths it-

Joke
"Summoner, does your name happen to be Paul?"


Challenges:

There will come soft rains - Stils people have endured their own personal apocalypse, with their lands desolated and their once thriving civilization driven to the point of extinction. The survivors are rallying, but its taken generations and what has emerged is a tough, rugged people who wait and pray for the day it may rain again.

Scavengers - Stil gains attack damage from each nearby enemy champion, additionally, he needs an enemy to break his shield in order to maximize its usefulness and exploit its heal, which also scales with the number of nearby enemies.

Adaptation - He is all about adapting to the situation, Stils ultimate ability changes any one of his regular spells into a much more potent form, allowing him to get more of what he needs in any circumstance.

And if you don't get it, Stil is based roughly on Stilgar, a hero of the Fremen of Dune.<<< BOOSH!!!
Overall: 36/40
Lore: 3/5
Stats: 5/5
Gameplay 5/5
Abilities: 23/25


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Moby the White

Senior Member

01-30-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by dominorox71 View Post
A large self propelled sentient stagecoach that uses fuel as a resource instead of mana or energy. Fuel can only be refilled at certain places

Passive- King of the Road- Yukon slowly gains 10 more (base) movespeed than nearby enemy champions because nobody goes faster than Yukon, Do you know how much IP Yukon costs?! Additionally when Yukon runs out of Fuel he stops moving until he is assisted by a friendly champion.

Q- Hit and Run- Fuel 100/150/250/380/500 Yukon doesn't have time to exchange information can't you see he's late? Dashes forward knocking back all units hit and deals 70/85/95/100/135 Physical damage (+3% of armor and 1% of movespeed)

W- Never Signal - Fuel 100/200/300/400/500 You don't need to know where Yukon wants to go because Yukon is going there wether you want him to or not. Switches lanes completely without warning can be cast twice blindly before going on cooldown regardless of the saftey of other laners. If Yukon hits an enemy champion upon entering a lane he deals 90/110/180/200/230 Physical damage (+3% of armor and 1% of movespeed)

E- Reckless Operation - Fuel 110/190/320/430/500 If you get in Yukon's way while he's swerving about that's your problem not Yukon's. Yukon swerves all over an area dealing 80/100/140/190/200 Physical damage (+3% of armor and 1% of movespeed)

R- Emmisions- Fuel 1/sec (Cannot be toggled activated upon movement)Yukon doesn't care about the air who do you think he is, Janna? Yukon leaves a trail of slightly toxic gas that slowly damages the flora of Runeterra and deals 30/50/90 Magic damage per second (+3% of armor and 1% of movespeed)

Skin options: Drug Dealer Yukon- Yukon's windows are tinted solid black and his rims are 5 inches bigger than normal and made of chrome.

I don't even..


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Moby the White

Senior Member

01-31-2013

and done...


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Moby the White

Senior Member

01-31-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by Raptamei View Post
Ty.



My English is better than your Dutch.



The second and third components intentionally don't scale. When you max Q first, you will obviously use Q-[something]-[something] a lot until the other spells catch up in level, but that still gives you 9 options. If every component scaled, you would simply always use QQQ.

Btw, 950 range is about the range of Lux's binding.
lux is a glass cannon your point is moot


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Moby the White

Senior Member

01-31-2013

mookomann: 30/40
green earth guy: IC
sSs RVNCommander: IC
Espy Psyche: 32/40
phocomelus: 32/40
1dislike: IC
Raptamei: 33/40
Pirateelfdog: IC
Nacoran: 27/40
SuperSulf: 32/40
Still Eternity: 31/40
BlackJubilee: IC
Sigismund: 32/40
Dithreabhach: 30/40
Munkey20: 33/40
SwaggerOats IC


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Mookomaan

Senior Member

01-31-2013

Just ****ED up my name.


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GabrielaSiete

Member

01-31-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by Moby the White View Post
mooksomann: 30/40
green earth guy: IC
sSs RVNCommander: IC
Espy Psyche: 32/40
phocomelus: 32/40
1dislike: IC
Raptamei: 33/40
Pirateelfdog: IC
Nacoran: 27/40
SuperSulf: 32/40
Still Eternity: 31/40
BlackJubilee: IC
Sigismund: 32/40
Dithreabhach: 30/40
Munkey20: 33/40
SwaggerOats IC
Did I get DQ'd when I wasn't looking D:

In all seriousness though, I think you forgot to add me to the list, lol.


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Sulfuric

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Senior Member

01-31-2013

Pretty sure that list is incomplete, as from what I read DryRun has the highest score with 36.


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GabrielaSiete

Member

01-31-2013

Quote:
Originally Posted by SuperSulf View Post
Pretty sure that list is incomplete, as from what I read DryRun has the highest score with 36.
Maybe the list omits the three highest scores or something? It would make sense if he was reserving those for a "winner's" post.


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Munkey20

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Senior Member

01-31-2013

yay! I didn't do too badly according to Moby.