True Purpose (a Blitzcrank Short Story)

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Frost Archer

Senior Member

11-29-2012

It's good. I like it. You convey good meaning without exactly incorporating things like "Love". My faith in future writers has now been restored

But, if our sun went out, wouldn't our planet be crushed by the sheer gravity of the new dwarf? In a few trillion years, black holes would consume everything (if the scientists are correct). How would the sapling grow without the sun?

BUT- This story is amazing. AND it makes sense (if you remove the time based stuff). I like your bittersweet ending, but some of this would be factually incorrect. You could say how the void invasion and stuff occurred, how vic and friends died, but 18 trill is too long. You should change what you said about the universe dead. The planet dead - ok. Sun - not ok.

Also, even if an A.I. had feelings, they are still ARTIFICIAL. I think it would have been a nice touch if he kept on questioning his feelings, like: "I miss Viktor." But did he really? His algorithms did not agree. But what cause this sense of longing? Blitzcrank did not truly feel, but he remembered etc.

GJ! GL! Keep it up!


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I Am Illiterate

Member

11-29-2012

very nice, very touching ;__;


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kittytoast

Senior Member

11-29-2012

*sniff* Who's chopping onions!?

I'm so glad someone read/bumped this. This should really be added to the index!!


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Yasako

Senior Member

11-29-2012

Okay, so I read the first few lines and can't read any further until you correct this one thing.
"...his master Viktor."
1.) Viktor didn't make Blitzcrank. A nameless scientist did, and said scientist's achievements were stolen by some random jerkhead dude.
2.) Blitzcrank was liberated from being owned/servitude under jerkhead dude by popular vote regarding his sentience.


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Trolosaurus

Senior Member

11-29-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by mak556 View Post
Okay, so I read the first few lines and can't read any further until you correct this one thing.
"...his master Viktor."
1.) Viktor didn't make Blitzcrank. A nameless scientist did, and said scientist's achievements were stolen by some random jerkhead dude.
2.) Blitzcrank was liberated from being owned/servitude under jerkhead dude by popular vote regarding his sentience.
Hang on, let me dig up Viktor's lore....

Early in life, Viktor discovered his passion for science and invention, particularly in the field of mechanical automation. He attended Zaun's prestigious College of Techmaturgy and led the team that constructed Blitzcrank, a scientific breakthrough that he expected to vault him to the top of his profession.

Man.... this story keeps popping up. I've done a few stories since but none have been as successful as this, much less actually get replies and comments.


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Yasako

Senior Member

11-30-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trolosaurus View Post
Hang on, let me dig up Viktor's lore....

Early in life, Viktor discovered his passion for science and invention, particularly in the field of mechanical automation. He attended Zaun's prestigious College of Techmaturgy and led the team that constructed Blitzcrank, a scientific breakthrough that he expected to vault him to the top of his profession.

Man.... this story keeps popping up. I've done a few stories since but none have been as successful as this, much less actually get replies and comments.
Whoa, I don't remember that. My brain must be operating on outdated lore...


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SmashedFish

Member

12-01-2012

ALL the manly tears. This is very well written, and all the sadder for it, even if Blitz was able to complete his final directive. Great fic all around.


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Drakojan

Member

12-01-2012

:O...
Just... just :O.


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Farstride

Senior Member

12-03-2012

Glad this was bumped up


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I Am Illiterate

Member

01-08-2013

bump for a good read