[Champion Concept - Revamp] Zarek, the Kinkou Gadgeteer

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Dokueki Kenshin

Senior Member

09-05-2012

Note to RiotGames Inc. and its employees: I, the creator of this creative material, would be more than happy to allow the use of anything in this individual post for League of Legends. I only ask that I be given free permanent ownership of the related champion and perhaps a small IP/RP stipend as a reward for my labor.

Hello, everyone. I'm here to try and do the unthinkable: expand on the ranks of the Kinkou. I've always loved Energy as a resource type, and wanted to make a ranged AD champion, since Kennen is most commonly played as a burst caster. So, with that in mind, I present to you Zarek, the Kinkou Gadgeteer.

Overview:

  • Gender: Male
  • Race: Human
  • Origin: Unknown (the location of the village Lee Sin destroyed hasn't been revealed, I don't think. Zarek is from that village).
  • Alliance/Alignment: Kinkou (Ionia)/Evil (revenge plot)
  • Class: AD Carry/AD Burst Caster
  • Subclass: Ranged, Carry, Ninja (:3)
  • Weapon: Senbon - Large Metal Combat Needles used as throwing weapons; Kyōshin Gauntlet - A gauntlet Zarek wears to amplify the penetration effects of his needles (Heartseeker Senbon); Chi Belt - Zarek channels his Chi into this belt, which causes his needles to vibrate at a very high frequency, increasing their ability to pierce through the opponent's defenses and disrupt their energies (Chi Disrupt).
  • Attack Type: Ranged
  • Energy Source: Energy.

Theme: Zarek is theme-based; the abilities came after. I wanted something involved with Lee Sin's original "sin" of accidentally blowing up that village, which gave me the idea of a doctor who had traveled to Ionia to learn more about their medical practices who survived the destruction. I liked the idea of acupuncture being part of his practice, giving me the idea for the senbon as weapons (large needles). The Kinkou and energy system go hand in hand, but I wanted to stay away from a typical ‘ninja’ theme in order to keep him unique, hence the use of his gadgets. Zarek can be played either as an AD Burst Caster or as a typical Ranged AD Carry.

Physical Description (see picture):
  • Height: 5' 11"
  • Build: Lean and muscular (runner's build).
  • Hair Color/Style: Black with maroon highlights and long bangs in front.
  • Eye Color: Yellow.
  • Weapons: Senbon and Chi-Powered Gadgets.
  • Attire: Thin, netted shirt worn under a thick black and maroon hooded leather vest over his torso; steel pauldrons; and Kyōshin Gauntlet on his left arm with a fingerless glove on his right. Tactical googles over his eyes and a traditional Kinkou face mask over his mouth; a large maroon scarf over his left pauldron; Chi Belt around his waist, thick fabric strips to cover and protect the pelvis and groin on the inside waist; shinobi trousers tied to his ankles; metal knee pads, preventing injury to critical joints; and traditional maroon jika-tabi on his feet.

Stats:

Health - 380 (+80/level) = 1730 at level 18
Health Regeneration - 5 (+.55/level) = 14.35 at level 18
Energy - 200
Energy Regeneration - 50/5 sec.
Armor - 13 (+3.5/level) = 72.5 at level 18
Magic Resist - 30
Move Speed - 310
Attack Range - 575
Attack Speed - .68 (+2.8%/level) = 1.004 at level 18
Attack Damage - 48 (+2.8/level) = 95.6 at level 18

Abilities

Passive - Chi Infusion

(Innate) After every 6 basic attacks, Zarek's next spell will become empowered with Chi, granting an additional effect based on the spell used. Energy costs for all spells under the effect of Chi Infusion refund (10/15/20) Energy when they hit an enemy unit or monster. This energy refund applies only to the first enemy hit.

Ability 1 (Q) - Heartseeker Senbon
Cost - 70/65/60/55/50 Energy
Cooldown - 7/6.5/6/5.5/5 seconds
Maximum Damage - 40/80/120/160/200 (+1.0 per bonus attack damage)
Minimum Damage - 12/24/36/48/60 (+.3 per bonus attack damage)
Range - 1000
Width - 100
(Active) Zeke activates his gauntlet and throws a skill shot senbon, dealing physical damage to all targets it hits. Each enemy beyond the first takes 10% less damage, down to a minimum of 30%.

(Chi Infusion) - Heartseeker Senbon's damage reduction rate is reduced by 50%, and its range is increased by 300.

Ability 2 (W) - Utsusemi
Cost - 60 Energy
Teleport Radius - 450
Cooldown - 16/15/14/13/12
(Active) Using his Chi, Zarek teleports a short distance away and creates three clones scattered throughout his teleport radius. These clones each have 50% of Zarek's health, last for 3 seconds, and do not do damage. These clones will run away from the teleport radius in different directions until they either disappear or run into an enemy target, which they will auto-attack for no damage. After teleporting, Zarek gains a (10%/15%/20%/25%/30%) attack speed bonus and a (10/15/20/25/30) attack damage bonus for the next 3 seconds.

(Chi Infusion) - Utsusemi's clone duration is increased by 2 seconds, and the attack speed and attack damage bonus durations are increased by 2 seconds.

Ability 3 (E) - Chi Disrupt
Cost - 70 Energy
Range - 800
Damage - 100/145/190/225/270 (+1.1 per bonus attack damage)
Cooldown - 14/13/12/11/10
(Passive) - Zarek's Chi Belt constant enhances his abilities, giving Zarek's basic attacks and abilities (5%/7.5%/10%/12.5%/15%) additional armor penetration.
(Active) - Zarek sends his belt into overdrive and throws a vibrating senbon which homes in on the target, dealing physical damage, restoring (20/25/30/35/40) Energy, and silencing the target for (1/1.25/1.5/1.75/2) seconds. Zarek loses his passive armor penetration until Chi Disrupt's cooldown refreshes.

(Chi Infusion) - Chi Disrupt's cooldown is reduced by 3 seconds.

Ability 4 - Ultimate (R) - Vengeful Storm
Energy - 80/70/60 Energy
Range - 900
Cone Width - 50
Single Burst Damage - 100/140/180 (+.45 per attack damage)
Maximum Damage to One Enemy - 300/420/540 (+1.35 per attack damage)
Cooldown Between Each Burst - .5 seconds
Cooldown - 150/120/90
(Active) Concentrating a large amount of Chi into his senbon, Zarek fires out a large spread of needles in a short burst cone, dealing physical damage to all enemies it hits and reducing their armor by (20/30/40) for 4 seconds. This armor reduction does not stack, but the duration is refreshed each time Vengeful Storm hits an opponent. Zarek can activate this ability up to 3 times within a 7 second period before it goes on cooldown.

(Chi Infusion) - Each activation of Vengeful Storm deals (25/50/75) additional true damage to all enemies it hits.

Lore:

Zarek was not originally a warrior. Instead, he had been a doctor in his home village. He was especially interested in non-traditional medicine, having traveled to and returned from Piltover for the sake of learning more about their technology with a very curious set of gadgets and a formidable arsenal of technological knowledge. Hearing of Ionia's unusual yet effective medicinal practices, he traveled there as well, hoping to bring what he learned back to his village to help cure sicknesses and diseases. He acquired much knowledge during his trip, most noteworthy being a mastery of the art of acupuncture. When Zarek finally returned home after years of research, he was horrified to find that everything he had held dear had been obliterated, and the scorched, smoking grounds of what used to be his home was under guard by Institute of War investigators. The Institute's representatives conveyed the news that a recent summoning ritual had gone awry, the magical feedback obliterating his entire village. Completely at a loss, Zarek returned to Ionia, a place that had become a second home.

When he arrived, he wandered through Ionia's many gardens, hoping to find some sort of peace. Such efforts were proving to be in vain until he happened upon a conversation between two Shojin monks of the incident... and one of them made mention of a new arrival at the monastery, a young summoner seeking to atone for a great sin. Hearing of this, Zarek's blood boiled with vengeance; he knew that it could not simply be coincidence. Knowing he would need power to get his revenge, Zarek sought out the Kinkou, having learned of them on his first journey to Ionia. The journey almost meant his end, as he only narrowly escaped a landslide during an especially stormy night. Exhausted and disoriented, Zarek became lost in Ionia's forest and was soon captured by Kinkou's scouts, having unwittingly wandered into their territory. When they offered to return him back to civilization, however, he instead begged for the chance to join their ranks. The Kinkou allowed his entry with the condition that he would pledge his life to their cause. Zarek did so without hesitation. For years, he trained his body and mind with a steely focus and white-hot rage, the needles which once healed now becoming his choice of weapon. He soon made a name for himself in the Kinkou by inventing the first weapons and mechanical devices powered by one's own energy. Learning that the summoner turned monk, known by the moniker of Lee Sin, had entered the League of Legends, Zarek soon followed along with the famed Triumvirate, using Kinkou's purpose as a means to achieving his true goal.

Dialogue:
  • Champion Selection: "Midnight's vengeance has come."
  • Movement: "Destiny watches."
    "The appointed time approaches."
    "The shadows are my guide."
    "For the Kinkou!"
    "I pierce the veil of deception."
    "To arms, summoner!"
  • Attack: "Your end is nigh."
    "Feel the needle's sting!"
    "Vengeance drives me."
    "Out of my way!"
    "The unwary shall fall!"
    "You dare to stand against me?!"
    "Your death will be quick."
  • Q Use: "Fly..."
  • W Use: "Midnight falls..."
  • E Use: "Begone..."
  • R Use: "Know my wrath!"
  • Taunts: "Another fool challenges the shadows."
    "Believe me: your idiocy is far from inspiring."
  • Jokes: Is this about that facial nerve? Yeah... my bad."
    "I am vengeance... I am the night... I am... incredibly bored."
  • Dance: Michael Jackson freestyle ending with the moonwalk.

Change Log:

(08/15/2012) Edited Vengeful Storm (R - Ultimate) to reflect both the single shot damage and the cumulative damage to one target.
(08/15/2012) Edited Heartseeker Senbon (Q) to include projectile width.
(08/16/2012) Lowered base damage values on Chi Disrupt and raised the bonus attack damage scaling (E).
(08/16/2012) Lowered base damage values on Heartseeker Senbon (Q).
(08/17/2012) Changed wording on Chi Infusion (Innate) and changed the Chi Infusion effect on Heartseeker Senbon (Q).
(08/21/2012) Dropped the activation count for Chi Infusion (Innate) by 1; removed Energy refund from Heartseeker Senbon (Q) and changed the damage from base attack damage to bonus attack damage; increased energy cost of Chi Disrupt (E) by 20 Energy, all cooldowns by 2 seconds, increased its passive armor penetration ratio and added on Energy refund to its active; reduced base damages and armor shredding on Vengeful Storm by half, increased the cone size, reduced the length of the armor shredding duration by 1 second, and made it stackable.
(08/22/2012) Increased the damage scaling for Chi Disrupt (E); edited his lore.
(09/05/2012) Added the Build Items section.
(09/05/2012) Added the Dominion Alternatives section and the Runes section.
(09/05/2012) Changed Zeke's Picture. Take a look!
(09/05/2012) Added thematic/physical description details.
(09/06/2012) Changed the Chi Infusion effect for Heartseeker Senbon (Q); increased the length of Utsusemi's stealth and the Chi Infusion's stealth timer increase (W); decreased Chi Disrupt's bonus attack damage by .1, implemented the silence into its normal active, and replaced its Chi Infusion effect with a singular 3 second cooldown reduction (E); reverted armor reduction back to a higher, non-stackable value that refreshes with each hit on Vengeful Storm (R). Also, added his dance!
(09/07/2012) Replaced an erroneously removed effect from Heartseeker Senbon's Chi Infusion effect (Q).
(09/12/2012) Removed unneeded description from introduction, theme, physical description, item listings, and rune listings; edited description of Chi Infusion (Innate).
(09/16/2012) Changed Utsusemi's base effect and Chi Infusion effect (W); dropped Chi Disrupt's damage ratio and increased the energy refund by 10 at each rank; reduced the cone width and range on Vengeful Storm (R). Also, made some minor grammar corrections.
(09/16/2012) Removed the recommended items section, as item build will change based on needs and player preferences.
(09/18/2012) Shortened attire description and removed Stealth from subclass.
(09/23/2012) Removed the runes section and added clone duration to Utsusemi (W).


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Bog Gobin

Recruiter

09-05-2012

Your not getting any reviews because this is a lot to read. I think would prefer reviewing a nonhuman because that species is annoying and smelly.

Passive: Refund + bonus effect based ability used. This seems fine. The refund is low because the energy based champions regenerate that energy faster than mana so they don't need the small refund.

Ability 1: This seems fine.
Bonus Effect: The bonus range doesn't really matter because the enemy champion will still be behind the annoying minions to reduce damage and getting an enemy low on health usually requires using an ability or other damage output source. this means that you would have to attack 6 more times to benefit from the bonus range that would be used to finish a kill.

I suggest you make his bonus effect reduce the damage dropping and apply the range instead of having just the range.

Ability 2: The stealth is short. Stitch has more than 3 at his lowest level.
Bonus Effect: His stealth is still low and I would do this slightly differently.

Ability 3: This okay. You are spending more energy than you are leaching.

Ult: This powerful but okay.

Overall this champion is fine. There are a few things that bothered me.


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Skyhawke

Senior Member

09-06-2012

Hi Dokueki Kenshin! I really enjoyed reading your champion concept, and I agree that we could use some more energy-based champions. Maybe I'll get to work on that energy-based support!

Lore - Well revenge is used a lot as a theme, but I do like what you did with the story and his connections to Lee Sin. I like the Kinkou and Piltover crossover a lot. I love the story because it would create some interesting storylines when the Lore gets expanded. What would he do if he found out that his rage against Lee Sin wasn't as founded as he thought it was? Coooool stuff. The one weakness here is that it doesn't seem likely that the Kinkou would help him.

Passive - Well, the empowered abilities thing has been played out a bit in my opinion, but it is a good concept that creates essential decisions when playing the character. Unfortunately, I think as an AD carry he would be almost forced to choose only one empowered ability, but more on that later.

Q - Decent ability. It's a lot like Cait's Q, but will be a bit more annoying since you can't OOM. This will make him a tough opponent in the laning phase. I agree with TBE that the bonus effect would probably need to be changed.

W - There's a lot going on with this skill. It is his primary steroid, plus a dash, plus stealth. I like the idea of very short stealth skills, because I think it is a fun mechanic. This skill would probably primarily play out like Twitch's ambush, but it is a bit different. The big issue with this skill is that as an AD carry, I would see him needing to empower this skill every time, since it makes his steroid a lot more useful. Also, if he didn't already have the empowered shot ready for the fight, he would have to wait for a few AA hits to start his steroid.

E - I like the idea of a silence on an AD carry, I don't think we have that. It would be good for laning, and also as a quick "emergency button" when you get pounced on by a bruiser or assassin. However, like I mentioned above, the empowered ability will probably be used for a steroid. Other than that, I actually don't see this ability being used much lategame, since he would probably rather keep the pen for the length of the fight.

R - Love this ability. Would have a cool feel to it. Plays out a little like Irelia's ult, but being on an AD carry I think it would play out a bit differently.

Overall, I think you have a good lore, theme, and mechanical base for this champion. If it were me (meaning this is just MY suggestion), I'd try and focus on the uber-burst vs sustained damage angle with all your abilities. Make the player choose between blowing all his energy and skills at once to destroy one tankier target or to have better sustained damage overall. One example of this would be changing his ult to not stack the armor pen (obviously number changes would have to occur) and forcing the player to blow all the damage at once, at the cost of not getting the full, sustained benefit of the armor pen. But it's your champ! Ultimately it's your vision and you know what direction you're aiming for. I do think the empowered abilities do need to be switched up a bit though.

Also, this is a bit more general advice, but I'd look at a few of the champs that he is most similar to, and do a compare/contrast with each one, seeing what he brings to the table as opposed to those champs (I'm thinking Corki, Ezreal, Caitlin, and Twitch, for different reasons). And "energy" shouldn't be one of those differences Yes, it technically counts, but in reality resource systems are a means to an end, they help provide the qualities you look for and are not a quality in and of themselves, does that make sense?

Anyway, hope that helps and thanks for the awesome concept!

--Skyhawk47, CCF Council member--


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Dokueki Kenshin

Senior Member

09-06-2012

Admittedly, I did not start making Zarek until I took a nice long excruciatingly focused read through Katsuni's champion construction guide, and a couple of his aspects where heavily influenced by his advice.

Lore: Oddly enough, I consulted both the official Ionian lore and some more experienced members on the Lore forum about the Kinkou's acceptance policies. The most definitive answer I received was that so long as a person swears to uphold the principles of the Kinkou that they would be accepted into their folds. Their internal structure is very much based on an older honor system. I'm standing by it because others have validated its plausibility, if nothing else.

Passive: I do understand that the additional effect thing can be a bit overplayed, but I wanted to avoid having an Innate that didn't offer some sort of decision making capability on the player's part. I do understand that some of the bonus effects will need work, but I made it based on basic attacks for a VERY specific reason: the difference between AD Burst and AD Carry tactics. A character that focuses on AD Burst will not need to worry too much at all about inflicting CC or different effects on the opponent. All they need to do is get close, barf on the opponent, and get out. An AD Carry, on the other hand, is not free of those concerns, and will need to focus a bit more on what utility they can get out of their kit.

In reality, that is also what Zarek brings to the table that is unique: while most ranged AD characters have the one role they fit into, Zarek is actually free to make the choice. As an example, Ezreal and Corki can't be played very effectively as AD Burst casters. Inversely, Caitlyn is very much suited to be an AD Burst caster (which is why seeing people play her as a carry concerns me), and while Graves CAN work somewhat well as a carry, he's definitely more suited as an AD caster as well. Zarek, unlike any of these choices, can comfortably fit into either role and, if need be, switch roles mid-game without having his gameplay suffer. Also, while I would usually agree that the resource type shouldn't be the only reason that one champion is different from another, changing the resource a character uses alone changes the way that the character is played, particularly with something as finite as energy.

Oh, and on a small note, energy characters typically have two manners of recovering energy for their set. While energy does regen very quickly, resource management without any sort of refund is still problematic, even for energy characters. I didn't even realize this until you mention it, but this aspect itself will also play a part in what role people would choose to play Zarek in since one regen source is based on his innate and basic attacks while the other is based on a very bursty ability.

Q: I understood what you meant here. Instead of only giving him range, I decided to make the Chi Infusion effect something that increases the efficiency of his damage: a 50% decrease in the damage reduction rate per enemy hit.

W: I know that there is quite a bit going on with this, but there is a method to my madness. Utsusemi has two very important functions, and its construction was almost entirely inspired by a point mentioned in Katsuni's champion creation guide. Utsusemi is not just a damage/attack speed steroid; it is also Zarek's sole positioning/escape tool aside from Summoner Flash. Normally, this seems fairly rigged, but using this ability at the wrong time also spells disaster. The whole idea is that before using Utsusemi, players have to make a quick risk analysis and determine whether they can afford to be aggressive and capitalize on the extra damage or if they need to save it to bail if or when things go south. It's partially why I made the stealth duration so short, the other reason being that ranged characters don't need as much time to position themselves as, say, a jungler like Shaco or Evelynn would. Still, I did increase the stealth times on both the base and enhanced effect by half a second to allow a little more wiggle room.

E: I get what you mean, and that's honestly part of the point, actually. For AD Carries, they're more likely to keep this on the back burner to amplify their basic attacks. AD Burst Casters, on the other hand, will probably make more liberal use of this ability. That said, I do see how the CC being entirely based on the Chi Infusion effect might be troublesome. I also agree that in its current form it wouldn't see much late-game use. With that in mind, I did three things:

  • I decreased the bonus attack damage ratio by .1 to a total of +1.45 per bonus attack damage.
  • I spliced the silence into its base effect instead of its Chi Infusion effect.
  • I replaced the Chi Infusion effect with a cooldown buffer of 3 seconds.

With those changes, I'm fairly certain that your concerns were addressed. Let me know if you feel otherwise.

R: Thanks. Oddly enough, I was thinking more along the lines of Xerath when I made this move. Originally, it was going to be an aim/click cone, but one of my reviewers brought up the fact that there's a lot of time to move between each second click and recommended that I just use the pointer as the recticle. Per your advice, I reverted back to a non-stackable armor reduction.


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Dokueki Kenshin

Senior Member

09-10-2012

Bump.


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Poeta Somnium

Senior Member

09-11-2012

Hello Dokueki, Poet here representing the CCF Council.

You expressed a desire to make your concept a bit more consice without sacrificing content; I don't think that content is your problem. Everything you have is relevent to the character and gameplay. Rather, it's the way in which you deliver the information that has turned this into such a wall of text.

I can tell that you are a proficient writer; you have a very distinct 'voice' and personal style to your writing in which you interact with the reader. This is great if you are writing a novel, not so much when trying to quickly and clearly convey an idea. My advice is to go through and trim out some of the "dialogue" you have inbetween factoids and simply deliver the facts.

For instance, your introduction combined with your "Theme" section combined are a lofty 400 words, and really they cover the same basic points; who your champ is, what inspired him, and your design goals. Below I have combined the two and removed any uneeded text, cutting your word count in half while still delivering all the information regarding your design process;

Quote:
Hello, everyone. I'm here to try and do the unthinkable: expand on the ranks of the Kinkou. I've always loved Energy as a resource type, and wanted to make a ranged AD champion, since Kennen is most commonly played as a burst caster. So, with that in mind, I present to you Zarek, the Kinkou Gadgeteer.

Zarek is theme based; the abilities came after. I wanted something involved with Lee Sin's original "sin" of accidentally blowing up that village, which gave me the idea of a doctor who had traveled to Ionia to learn more about their medical practices who survived the destruction. I liked the idea of acupuncture being part of his practice, giving me the idea for the senbon as weapons (large needles). The Kinkou and energy system go hand in hand, but I wanted to stay away from a ‘ninja’ theme in order to keep him unique, hence the use of his gadgets. Zarek can be played either as an AD Burst Caster or as at typical Ranged AD Carry.
Another thing you could take a look at is your physical description. It is exquisitely written; but your average reader is going to feel taxed going through the entire thing and having to imagine each and every detail. You already have decent concept art; why not bring the art itself to the forefront and then list a few quick points that may not be evident within the art? People like berevity; something quick and flashy that the brain can process all at once rather than a block of text in which they are required to assemble the idea themselves.

The only "unneeded" details you have are the descriptions of the items; most players know at least approximately the stats of the items in the game, no need to include their specifics. By simply providing a list of the items themselves, you will free up a huge amount of space.

These few changes should help streamline your concept a great deal. If you still aren't satisfied after these changes, don't hesitate to ask and I can take another look. =)

~ Poet (CCF Council)


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Dokueki Kenshin

Senior Member

09-11-2012

Took your advice to heart and removed some unneeded description.


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Dokueki Kenshin

Senior Member

09-15-2012

Bump.


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Dokueki Kenshin

Senior Member

09-17-2012

Bump.

And what the heck? Who gave me a -1?


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Dokueki Kenshin

Senior Member

09-20-2012

Bump.


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