Ask Cassiopeia

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Ask the Monkey

Senior Member

05-03-2012

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Originally Posted by AskPantheon View Post
Not at the rate you make friends. You will be at each other's throats in a week or less.
Ally - Common goal.
Friend - Not you.


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ColossusCrusher

Senior Member

05-03-2012

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Originally Posted by Ask Shyvana View Post
Hm. The Ionians helped me a lot in mastering my control... but I suspect that this is out of the question for you. Udyr would likely be willing to help, but he would help the other way, insisting you give in to your snake side.

Dating, though... as shallow as humans are, I've seen the heart overcome some pretty huge things. Let me ask you, where have you looked for men? Men more attuned to nature would likely be far more likely to consider you. ...Udyr, for example.
Didn't you just say that Udyr would insist I give in to the serpent? Not that it matters, as I saw his question thread and he stated that love would be a distraction for him. As for where I looked, well, I used to just go up to foreign dignitaries and use my charms on them, but now most would-be suitors make excuses once they realize the full extent of my transformation. Would you believe how many of them think I'm still fully humanoid, just with scales and claws? I think you've been a bad influence in that regard. *winks*

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Originally Posted by Ask the Monkey View Post
But....but....I like bananas. What does that have to do with steroid types?
It's mostly that monkeys like bananas, and you are a monkey king. If people think that they can distract you by tossing a banana in the opposite direction it negatively affects your reputation. I am, however, willing to work with you against that half-naked Rakkor any day of the week. Would you like to meet at a later date and discuss possible options?

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Originally Posted by Ask Fortune View Post
Play nice, boys.

Hey Cass, sorry about what happened to you. But don't think you're not still an attractive woman! How about we go to Bilgewater. We can go to one of the classier Ladies Clubs. A lot of guys poke around there, hoping to pick up the women who come and go. And if we don't land a guy, I'll spot you a few copper pieces to toss at the dancers inside~. Waddya say?
Hello Sarah,

That sounds like a wonderful opportunity! I haven't been able to just relax and unwind for a while now, and some R&R sounds like a great idea. Do any of these clubs have specials on Monday? It's the least cluttered day of my schedule for the near future - I still need to negotiate and read diplomatic briefs, even if the more physical parts of my job have dried up recently.

-The Serpent's Embrace


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AskPantheon

Senior Member

05-03-2012

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Originally Posted by ColossusCrusher View Post
It's mostly that monkeys like bananas, and you are a monkey king. If people think that they can distract you by tossing a banana in the opposite direction it negatively affects your reputation. I am, however, willing to work with you against that half-naked Rakkor any day of the week. Would you like to meet at a later date and discuss possible options?
I live up on a mountain. Come up here and get me.



Pantheon, the Artisan of War


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Ask Fortune

Senior Member

05-03-2012

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Originally Posted by ColossusCrusher View Post
Hello Sarah,

That sounds like a wonderful opportunity! I haven't been able to just relax and unwind for a while now, and some R&R sounds like a great idea. Do any of these clubs have specials on Monday? It's the least cluttered day of my schedule for the near future - I still need to negotiate and read diplomatic briefs, even if the more physical parts of my job have dried up recently.
Nah, they don't have specials, but you won't mind when you see what they're all about. They'll be the second longest snakes you've ever seen~.


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Ask Shyvana

Senior Member

05-03-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by ColossusCrusher View Post
Didn't you just say that Udyr would insist I give in to the serpent? Not that it matters, as I saw his question thread and he stated that love would be a distraction for him. As for where I looked, well, I used to just go up to foreign dignitaries and use my charms on them, but now most would-be suitors make excuses once they realize the full extent of my transformation. Would you believe how many of them think I'm still fully humanoid, just with scales and claws? I think you've been a bad influence in that regard. *winks*
Yes, we certainly are quite different, despite both being half something. These suitors are apparently not that smart, though. Snakes reproduce just as humans do. They could certainly... well, you know, with you.

...but on a more wholesome topic, I'd like to ask, what problems do you have with Demacia? Speak freely, I assure you that your objections are likely nothing I haven't already heard.


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AskUdyr

Senior Member

05-03-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ask Shyvana View Post
Hm. The Ionians helped me a lot in mastering my control... but I suspect that this is out of the question for you. Udyr would likely be willing to help, but he would help the other way, insisting you give in to your snake side.

Dating, though... as shallow as humans are, I've seen the heart overcome some pretty huge things. Let me ask you, where have you looked for men? Men more attuned to nature would likely be far more likely to consider you. ...Udyr, for example.
...Shyvana. Do not put words in our mouth that we have not spoken. Nor should you attempt to make us court anyone against our will. It will fail.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ColossusCrusher View Post
Didn't you just say that Udyr would insist I give in to the serpent? Not that it matters, as I saw his question thread and he stated that love would be a distraction for him. As for where I looked, well, I used to just go up to foreign dignitaries and use my charms on them, but now most would-be suitors make excuses once they realize the full extent of my transformation. Would you believe how many of them think I'm still fully humanoid, just with scales and claws? I think you've been a bad influence in that regard. *winks*
We would not insist you give in to the serpent. That would be incredibly stupid. That would make you lose any sentience that you have because of your status as a sentient being. The last time we gave in to the nature of the beast fully we went on a killing spree for a number of years. We do not sit in the forest cawing like a bird while flapping our arms in an attempt to fly, nor do we run on all fours when we hunt prey. We would advise you to accept your serpentine nature. There is a very large difference between accepting your form and the beauty in it and all of your new found strengths and weaknesses than simply giving in to the nature and eating mice all day and hibernating in the winter.


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Ask Shyvana

Senior Member

05-03-2012

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Originally Posted by AskUdyr View Post
...Shyvana. Do not put words in our mouth that we have not spoken. Nor should you attempt to make us court anyone against our will. It will fail.
Forgive me, Udyr. I was merely giving a general idea of what you'd suggest, based on what you've told me about how you live.


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Ask the Monkey

Senior Member

05-03-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by ColossusCrusher View Post
Didn't you just say that Udyr would insist I give in to the serpent? Not that it matters, as I saw his question thread and he stated that love would be a distraction for him. As for where I looked, well, I used to just go up to foreign dignitaries and use my charms on them, but now most would-be suitors make excuses once they realize the full extent of my transformation. Would you believe how many of them think I'm still fully humanoid, just with scales and claws? I think you've been a bad influence in that regard. *winks*



It's mostly that monkeys like bananas, and you are a monkey king. If people think that they can distract you by tossing a banana in the opposite direction it negatively affects your reputation. I am, however, willing to work with you against that half-naked Rakkor any day of the week. Would you like to meet at a later date and discuss possible options?



Hello Sarah,

That sounds like a wonderful opportunity! I haven't been able to just relax and unwind for a while now, and some R&R sounds like a great idea. Do any of these clubs have specials on Monday? It's the least cluttered day of my schedule for the near future - I still need to negotiate and read diplomatic briefs, even if the more physical parts of my job have dried up recently.

-The Serpent's Embrace
Sure, I do like planning mishaps. But do not get me wrong, I don't hate the brute, I just like messing with his easily enraged head.


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ColossusCrusher

Senior Member

05-03-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ask Fortune View Post
Nah, they don't have specials, but you won't mind when you see what they're all about. They'll be the second longest snakes you've ever seen~.
I don't know - I've seen some pretty long snakes. But I'll have to take you up on your offer.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ask Shyvana View Post
Yes, we certainly are quite different, despite both being half something. These suitors are apparently not that smart, though. Snakes reproduce just as humans do. They could certainly... well, you know, with you.

...but on a more wholesome topic, I'd like to ask, what problems do you have with Demacia? Speak freely, I assure you that your objections are likely nothing I haven't already heard.
I have no quarrel with Demacia beyond those required of my station. Demacian diplomats are worthy opponents, and seducing them was always one of my favored activities. Apart from governance, our states are not very different - both are militarized, major powers of Valoran, and we both know that full warfare would be fatal. I enjoy playing the game of intrigue. To test my wits against Demacia's finest negotiators would be a fine day indeed. Some of them would come crawling back for more, I know it. I leave the more visceral hatred of Demacia to my sister and the more martially minded.

Quote:
Originally Posted by AskUdyr View Post
We would not insist you give in to the serpent. That would be incredibly stupid. That would make you lose any sentience that you have because of your status as a sentient being. The last time we gave in to the nature of the beast fully we went on a killing spree for a number of years. We do not sit in the forest cawing like a bird while flapping our arms in an attempt to fly, nor do we run on all fours when we hunt prey. We would advise you to accept your serpentine nature. There is a very large difference between accepting your form and the beauty in it and all of your new found strengths and weaknesses than simply giving in to the nature and eating mice all day and hibernating in the winter.
That is an interesting view, Udyr, although I must say that the idea of you flapping your arms is quite funny. Accepting my nature would entail refusing to return to my original state, although I must admit it is quite fun to poison my enemies and attack them relentlessly. I will have to think about this further.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ask the Monkey View Post
Sure, I do like planning mishaps. But do not get me wrong, I don't hate the brute, I just like messing with his easily enraged head.
That should be vengeance enough. Do you think he would like a mildly poisoned banana?

-The Serpent's Embrace


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AskPantheon

Senior Member

05-03-2012

Quote:
Originally Posted by ColossusCrusher View Post
That should be vengeance enough. Do you think he would like a mildly poisoned banana?

-The Serpent's Embrace
I can see that, you know