||12-01-2012 09:40 AM
Sexuality and Friendship
[Note: When I say 'friend', I mean someone enjoy chatting with, go out to lunch, have some mutual interests, see a movie, and there's some degree of trust]
The other day I was contemplating why I'm friends with the people I am at work. While I'm 'friendly' with everyone, I go out of my way to talk to only a few people, and even less that I hang out with outside of work. I realized that it was mostly men, and the one woman I'm friends with is a uniquely funny and interesting girl. In contrast, I'm friends with most of the men that work there (note that that's, like, six). The few men I'm not friends with I have ZERO sexual interest in. The majority of the men I work with, if the conditions were just right, I could imagine sleeping with. There's a few, though, that I can never, ever see that happening. It's those guys I'm not friends with.
What I have concluded from this is that, unless someone is uniquely awesome, I require some level of sexual tension for an interesting and engaging friendship.
I also realize that a frequent complaint from women regarding male friends is that they're only interested in "on thing" and they're just being less direct about it. I think it's funny that I appear to be doing the same thing. Any thoughts on this? I'm particularly interested to see if any females relate.